"This is a Stupid Fucking Problem To Have" in Ultimate Randomness

  • Aug. 24, 2021, 10:41 p.m.
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I love that line. For those not in the know, that is a line from Bad Boys 2. The line is spoken by the villain of the movie, Johnny Tapia, in response to finding that there is a rat infestation in his mansion’s attic, which is also where he stores his money and the rats have decided to eat the money. Agreed, stupid fucking problem to have. My issue is also a really stupid problem to have, but in a much different way and I will go ahead and just warn anyone who sees this that we are in for some major TMI…as if my entries usually aren’t TMI. But this is going to have some very specific descriptions, so continue at your own peril.

SO, my issue. I am uncircumsized. Not sure exactly what the numbers are in terms of those who are vs. those who are not, but I am going to assume I am in the minority here in the US, at least. Growing up, it was never much of an issue, however that is where the issue has its genesis. See, as a kid, one thing I assume they teach most of us uncircumsized males is that it is important to maintain the elasticity of the foreskin. Surprise! Yeah, I’m sure most people would not know that you actually have to take action, starting as a kid, to maintain the elasticity of the skin covering the head of your ding-dong. The problem with doing this with kids is there are very few ways a doctor can relate to you why that would be important. Most 11 or 12 year olds aren’t thinking about sexual repercussions, or at least they weren’t when I was 11 or 12. So that is a dead avenue. And explaining how your skin will lose elasticity as an adult without explaining the issues that can come with that is also going to fall on deaf ears. Honestly, I don’t know what the solution would be as far as getting kids to take that seriously, but hopefully someone figured it out.

It should be pretty apparent by this point that the advice was dropped on my deaf ears. There are alot of contributing factors. Even when I was old enough to be interested in sex, it wasn’t terribly feasible due to my social life which I have explained in previous posts. Or lack thereof. So I never thought much of it. Also, because I didn’t make sure of the elasticity, I suspect that may actually have contributed to a lack of growth in that general area. Did I stunt the growth of my dick because I didn’t exercise the skin? Possibly. I have no idea honestly. Even when I was married, it was never all that much of an issue because we had sex, she at least accepted that my package was a little smaller and different. So again, never thought much of it. For the last 8 years, I have maybe had sex a half dozen times, all with my ex while she was single, which is another story, but the point being, there was never much reason to think about it then either.

So what prompted this entry? Well, this morning, I was in the shower and, as I tend to do every now and then, I did think about it and, like I do when I think about it, I tried to do the exercise and pull the foreskin back to reveal the head just to make sure the skin was elastic still. Well, I managed but it was not easy. It took a bit of maneuvering and was kinda tight, but I got it back and forth. Issue is, judging by the blood spots that showed up under the skin, I guess I must have popped a few small blood vessels. It doesn’t hurt and seems to be limited, but it is a bit of an issue. Not exactly sure what to do going forward. I will probably try to keep at it and hope it helps, but ya know, as you get older, the skin rarely gets more elastic. May give my doc a call and see if they have any advice. Hell, it may be a non-issue. I’m not getting younger, by dick isn’t getting any bigger anyway, and sex is limited to my dreams. I can still get an erection without it hurting and I have been able to give myself a go once or twice a day pretty much every day for the last two weeks. So the thing works the way its supposed to otherwise.

In any case, this is kind of an in depth TMI talk about one of the contributing factors to my other social issues. Just to give those that have read more of an idea why and where some of my hang ups come from. Long story short, I kinda wish my mom had just let them circumsize me as a baby and make this a non-issue. I know why she didn’t, but it seems like it just wasn’t worth avoiding a pain I wouldn’t remember anyway. Who knows? Anyway, sorry for the TMI, but life usually is, isn’t it? Have a great day everyone and I hope none of y’all have to understand any of this at any point.


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