Ironic that I’m writing this as a form of procrastination....
My sleep schedule is backwards, I’m in GMT and the bf is in CDT so currently 6 hours behind, this is fine for now because I’m not going to uni and can afford to sleep at 6am wand wake up at 11am (or so i thought).
I’m failing this project i cant work out how to engage my brain when i constantly flick through alternative scenarios that are better than the task at hand. This is everything from steal money and hop on a plane to live with the bf or take a steamy bath with my hair dryer. Anything is better than this. I love my degree but its so demanding, i feel like maybe 50% of the pressure is just added by me to be perfect but whether that’s true or not, if i dont submit anything I’ll fail anyway :)
I was settling to sleep at 6am as per, at which point my mother comes to say good bye heading to work and remind me of my “meeting in a couple if hours”..... I forgot about this and am currently arisen from my not quite slumber to try and blast out some for of presentable work for the meeting (i already cancelled online but my body is in fight or flight so may as well harness what energy its providing....)
Good lord please help me i’m not ready to become another statistic especially with the possibility of an actually caring relationship for once… The ex, who’s sister is now a statistic from my course, messaged me yesterday. I’m yet to reply, i want to discus with the bf but am worried he’ll get jealous or it would reflect badly on me some how.
If anyone reads this and has an music suggestion of any genre i may vibe with // work to id appreciate it!
Weight: Yesterday + maccies breakfast cus i wanted to die
Vibe: Cure For Me - AURORA
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