Alone again, naturally in Daydreaming on the Porch

  • Nov. 18, 2020, 9:36 p.m.
  • |
  • Public

..Feeling lonely doesn’t always mean that you are physically alone or feeling socially isolated. It may be that you’re feeling mentally or emotionally lonely — like no one truly understands what you’re going through…”

“We may also experience feelings of loneliness when we’re missing someone who once played a significant role in our lives but who is no longer here anymore.
No matter where feelings of loneliness stem from, many musicians have turned to their art to express what it means to feel lonely…”.

From www.loveliveson.com

It’s getting dark here about 5:15. I went for my walk at the park a little while ago and it was colder than it’s been since late last winter. We don’t get much cold weather, but I really noticed it today because it’s been so warm and mild, and the park is so full of flowers, including roses.

I came home to an empty house, as usual. I’ve been spoiled over the summer and Fall with long, warm days full of sunlight. Now the days seem exceptionally short, especially since I get up so late. So instead of feeling slight twinges of depression and loneliness late at night, they tend to descend on me during the afternoon about 5:30. Winter does that to me. All it takes is some cold weather and a quickly retreating afternoon.

Day after day and week after week, life in the pandemic continues on as if I’m living in some kind of never-ending dream. The months have become a blur. Loneliness and sadness are noticeably more frequent companions.

Since aloneness, loneliness and solitude have been an inescapable part of my life as long as I can remember, going back to high school and college, certain songs have jumped out at me and stuck around in my head for decades. I remember “Lonely Teardrops,” sung by Jackie Wilson, and Gilbert O’Sullivan’s “Alone Again, Naturally” from 1972. That song’s title, then as well as now, speaks directly to me. The song would come on the radio, and I’d nod silently in agreement. Loneliness is not good thing at all, and I think of myself as mostly cultivating solitude. But when real loneliness strikes, it can be one of the most painful things to endure, not to mention the harm it can do to our physical and mental well being.

I’ve put together a list of some of my favorite songs on this universal theme of loneliness, spanning four decades. These songs don’t really evoke melancholic moods in me. Rather, they are beautifully written and sung anthems which express some of the deepest feelings and emotions which make us human. Ironically, some of the times when I’ve felt most alone were when I was in crowds of people. All I wanted to do was get away and retreat back into my cozy little cocoon.

During the pandemic, a lot of us of a certain age find ourselves alone more than ever. These songs help me realize that whatever causes loneliness, I’m not alone .

Hank Williams”I’m So Lonesome I Could Cry”

Ricky Nelson “Lonesome Town”

Andy Williams “Lonely Street”

Eric Carmen “All By Myself”

Three Dg Night “One is the Loneliest Number”

The Beatles “Eleanor Rigby”

Gilbert O’Sullivan — “Alone Again Naturally”

Lastly, I came across this song not long ago. It’s from the 1990s. I had heard of “Green Day” but had never listened to them. But the words to this song caught my attention.

Green Day
“Boulevard of Broken Dreams”

“Boulevard of Broken Dreams”
I walk a lonely road
The only one that I have ever known
Don’t know where it goes
But it’s only me, and I walk alone
I walk this empty street
On the boulevard of broken dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I’m the only one, and I walk alone
I walk alone, I walk alone
I walk alone, and I walk a
My shadow’s only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart’s the only thing that’s beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
‘Til then I walk alone…


Last updated November 18, 2020


ConnieK November 18, 2020

I'm my own best company. I have a friend, a VERY sharp lady who is about to celebrate her 101st birthday who feels the same way. She's a bit bored but content enough. However, she and I speak to humans over the phone and see family members. Are you doing that? I'm finding exploring museum websites for free stuff is a good uplift to spirits, too.

I guess my song would be "I am a Rock".

Oswego ConnieK ⋅ November 18, 2020

“I’m my own best company.” That’s an excellent way to put it.

Oh, I love “I Am a Rock. I would have included that, but to me it’s more about pretending extreme self-suficiency and barricading oneself against the world and its rabble, than it is about loneliness, per se.

ConnieK Oswego ⋅ November 19, 2020

Same prism, different facets.

Oswego ConnieK ⋅ November 19, 2020

very nice analogy.

A Pedestrian Wandering November 18, 2020

The long nights do add their own weight, I think. Some Native American groups used this time to tell stories (probably not unlike the way we binge watch certain TV shows, and by we I mean me). Telling stories implies that there is both a teller and a listener so it is less lonely, but it also has the advantage of dispersing knowledge too. Prosebox has been good that way, to hear and be heard, and occasionally to provide a few nuggets of wisdom.

Marg A Pedestrian Wandering ⋅ November 19, 2020

I love the way you’ve put that last sentence - very true! :)

Marg November 19, 2020

I’m the same with the cold and dark days and nights - although my bedroom is nice and bright getting up late does make the days very much shorter and it can really get me down sometimes. Great choice of songs!

Marg November 19, 2020

It was an interesting experience watching the videos - I watched and listened intently to the ones I wasn’t so familiar with or hadn’t heard before but then the ones that were from my era, a little smile came on my face and I became lost in a world full of evocative memories :)

Wit' or witout November 19, 2020

Have you ever considered a rescue puppy/dog? Pets fill up your life like you wouldn't believe. Unconditional love and companionship overflow.

Oswego Wit' or witout ⋅ November 19, 2020

I have, but my situation where I live is so impermanent here that I wouldn’t want to take a chance. Also, most of the time I am very content with my solitude. There are just those times when the loneliness hits hard. My brother has a dog and a cat, and I enjoy them a lot when I go to visit.

mcbee November 19, 2020

Excellent collection of "lonely" songs. I have identified with sad songs way too much in my lifetime. "I'm so lonely I could cry" was something I started relating to as a teenager. Back then I did my share of socializing and had a boyfriend, but the song still touched me deeply. I think there are some us who can be in a room full of people and still feel alone. As your previous noter says...you have to learn to be your own best friend.

Oswego mcbee ⋅ November 19, 2020

A wise note that gives me a lot to think about. Those songs of loneliness make me realize how universal these feelings are and gives me comfort in knowing we all struggle with this.

Jinn November 19, 2020

I find the long evenings disturbing. Not really lonely but depressing. I like to have a ritual of turning on the lamps, lighting candles, burning some good incense then writing or watching something good on TV ( in between fixing supper ( for us and the pets) , clean up , and everyone needs a trip outside to do their thing:-) I stay busy even though I mostly want to veg . The dark makes me just want to curl up in my chair . 🤦‍♀️
Lots of good songs here !

Oswego Jinn ⋅ November 19, 2020

It’s not so much the long nights that bother me because I’m totally a night owl, it’s the fact hat it gets dark so early. It’s depressing at first, but then I gradually get accustomed to it.

Oswego November 19, 2020

It’s not so much the long nights that bother me because I’m totally a night owl, but it’s the getting dark so early that gets to me. It is kind of depressing at first, and then gradually I get accustomed to it.

Newzlady November 20, 2020

I’m often combatting emotional loneliness.

Oswego Newzlady ⋅ November 21, 2020

That’s the hardest kind because it’s really deep down and doesn’t go away as quickly.

Sabrina-Belle November 24, 2020

This time of year, as the nights draw in, can be really difficult. It's harder with the pandemic because there are no outings to look forward to. It must be especially hard for you as the first Christmas without your mother is approaching. I find this place comforting when I feel lonely.

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