Thoughts/personality in I write

I’m now focusing on my interview this week and doing little things I want to to change. I’m liking my mornings a lot more :)

I’ve never been a posting stuff on social media person. I never have been. I feel like I’d be doing it out of obligation or a duty. Even with anyone else, I rarely socialize. That’s how I naturally am. My life has been that way most of the time. I don’t dislike people, but I don’t seek making friends. I‘m like “cool!” if I happen to meet someone who I end up having a long conversation with.

No one should have to chase anyone else. Relationships happen naturally. They aren’t something that’s forced. Friendship should be there before long-term love forms.

Something doesn’t feel totally real about this having been only over social media. Makes me think that he doesn’t want anything serious.

Is it just me or does most people not do serious relationships over social media? Because I’m half the time confused if what’s going on is real. ?

Emotionally unavailable? I get that doubt both about myself and him.

It’s hard for me to be completely vulnerable on social media. I can’t explain it, I don’t feel comfortable or I don’t feel I belong? Or bc I don’t have any friends from school on social media so it’s like I feel alone there. Maybe I’m in the wrong story like he said before. I can’t force myself to be in something I can’t be myself in. I feel like I’m now just a person who’s listening and trying to be there.

Plus I’m literally in applying for job period of time. !!!!!

I’ve never been a friends forte person. I’ve like always been a loner person. As long as I see or interact with people (in real life) every day I’m contented.

I feel like there are so many types of love. I’m not sure what it is I have for him. Sometimes I think it’s a motherly love sometimes I think it’s a romantic love, I‘m confused. Hopefully time or something will tell.

I’m gonna just do my stuff, hopefully things will clear up one day.