Me Monday - 3/29/2004 Owie! I worked so hard in the garden Saturday my muscles are still sore. I decided to give Curves a miss tonight.

I finished The Body In The Transept by Jeanne M Dams on Friday. I've read a few other of her Dorothy Martin mysteries and thought they were OK but that was the first one in the series and was really good so Ive ordered the next two in the series. Now I'm trying to listen to Three Junes at work. Its a book about three Junes in a decade of a families life. I'm only on tape one so I haven't gotten too into it.

At home I finished Bubbles In Trouble which has dumb blonde Bimbo Bubbles going under cover in Amish country. Pretty funny! Especially since when Bubbles gets accidentally high on pot she becomes smart. :) I also finished my second Southern Sisters book. It was Murder Makes Waves by Ann George. Really enjoyed that one, and Im starting Murder Boogies with Elvis tonight.

Weds 3/31/2004

-As nice and sane as my family here in Missouri are my family in Utah (excluding my mom and brother) are un nice and crazy. I usually just avoid them and avoid talking about them but things there are going so nuts that its effecting my mom and brother. My Utah Grandma is getting frail and helpless. She lives a few blocks from my mom and dad, and my mom always stops and checks on the old witch every night after work. All my aunts, uncles, cousins, etc who never visited before have gotten wind that she is failing so they stop in during the day and get her all rattled so my mom has to spend an hour with her every night. They want to put her in a home, and she doesn't want to go and mom doesn't want to put her in one either. For once I agree with the others.

Ive always believed you should reap what you sow, and she has sown nothing but evil and cruelty all her life. She doesn't deserve to have my mom caring for her. She was a rotten mother in law and a rotten grandma. I can't even begin to list all my reasons for disliking her. The top five include raising my dad to be the insecure jerk he is today. The man was called stupid so many times as a child that he refuses to play any games or talk about any subject that might call his intelligence into question. He was never allowed to express anger so now the only way he can show anger or frustration is in passive aggressive ways. As a grandma she was always and kids should be seen and not heard and then wondered when we became adults why we didnt go see her.

Her crazy daughter who left her husband and eight kids because her therapist convinced her she had recovered memories of being abused as a child has taken to coming to see Grandma. Last time she was there she and Grandma got into a fight because she says Grandma never gave her money to go to the movies when she was a kid. How ridiculous is that! I may carry a grudge against the old bat but Im not going to argue with her over something that happened sixty years ago. The interesting thing is that after my aunt got mad and left Grandma found her trash on fire. Hmmm maybe my Utah family will end up being the lead story on the KSL evening news..... Again.

In other news I want a Diet Coke. Trying to decide if I want one bad enough to get dressed and make the trek to 7-11. I would settle for bottled water but I dont have any of that either. I keep putting off going to the grocery store. I make up menu plans and grocery lists and then decide none of it sounds good so I tear up the list.

Thursday 4/1/2004

OK gang. Im desperate for dinner ideas. Keeping in mind that I dont like fish or chicken suggest something for dinner. I dont need recipes just ideas. Im sick to death of my standard fare.

My aunt called today to say that Gina got the job working for a summer camp in Canadensis, PA. I guess thats somewhere near Scranton. It will be for eight weeks starting in June. She will teach beginning golf for half the day and be a camp counselor for the other half. We (aunt, me, uncle, maybe mom) are either going to go out there with her in June or visit at the half way point in July. Looking on the Internet there doesnt seem like much to do there. Im hoping we go on to somewhere more interesting like DC, or Philadelphia.

Gina has found out where she is going to be doing her student teaching this fall. Its at the high school closest to my house so that will be convenient for her. Of course every high school has its rough crowd but most of the kids are just typical middle class kids. I think its alot like the high school she came from so she ought to be right at home.

Me Sat 4-5-14

I read the best book last night and today. It was called The Lowland. Its about two Indian brothers in Calcutta in the 1950’s. One brother becomes a communist and the other goes to America to advance his education. When the communist brother dies the other brother steps in and marries his widow and raises his unborn daughter as his own. Beautiful writing and an interesting subject.

I had a very stressful Wednesday and Thursday. Wednesday mom called to say my Dad is in the hospital then Thursday I called to see how the test went and was told they didn't end up doing it. I didn't really get many details because they were still at the hospital. I was feeling left out and unwanted so I called Grandma on my way home from the gym and we had a good talk. I was sitting in my car in the driveway talking to gma when my neighbor Jessie pounded on the window and asked if I could give him a ride and it was an EMERGENCY. I said sure and started driving. It turns out his EMERGENCY was his wife and kids had left him and wouldn't tell them where they were so he wanted me to drive him around the neighborhood to see if we could find them. I suggested that his wife, Jessica, needed some time apart from him and that we go back home. He wouldn't hear of it, and I soon realized he was high on something. He kept answering questions I was not asking and then saying what? huh? He insisted that the window be down even though it was down in the 40’s. We ended up at Quick Trip where he let me call his wife. His Sister in law answered and said that they had left because he was acting weird and that I should stay at QT and keep him there until the police showed up. I offered to buy him a coke and he wanted donuts which I said no too. We walked out of QT and the police were there. They told me I could leave so I don't know if he ended up in jail. How twisted is it that when I’m basically abducted from my home by a strung out junkie the only thing I’m concerned about is staying on my diet and not eating a damn donut! Needless to say I had a major binge Friday to cope with the stress. Which I’m OK with. Next time I get that stressed I’m going to try to have other plans in place but if I deal with problems with a binge I’m not going to be hard on myself.

Why I’m awesome #3 and 4, and 5

3 I love that I do Zumba every week in the front row even though I have no rhythm and am really bad at it.

4 I love that I am winning the battle with depression. I accept the fact that I have it and take my medication. It took me a long time to reach that point.

5 I love my thin wrists. My wrists have always been small even when I was obese which should have been a clue to me that the story of me that was told to me and that I bought into of being a bigger framed person was bunk.

Good Things I did for me

Ran 12 miles

stayed in calorie range

Pictured flowers in my garden tulip tarda, snowdrops, tulips Queen of the Nile.