Everlasting Shadow - Entry #3 in Writings

  • March 28, 2014, 9:39 a.m.
  • |
  • Public

 Eddie blinked his eyes and got a good view of Link, upside down on his t-shirt, as he drifted back into consciousness.  He rubbed his eyes and looked around his room.  He could see the band posters on the walls, his television beyond the end of his bed, his dresser beside the window where rain was still falling outside, though the storm had let up some.  Just a dream, though Eddie.  A tear trailed it's way down his fuzzy cheek, like the raindrops sliding down the window's glass.  Eddie shook his head, trying to clear the malaise that was falling on him.  While the break-up had felt sudden to him, there had been signs that the end was coming.  When Terra used to look at Eddie, there was a playful light in her eyes, like she was planning all sorts of devious things to do to him, but pleasantly devious.  Eddie hadn't seen that light in well over a year.  When she would talk to him, she used to have this bubbly, teasing way of talking to him.  She was very playful.  That was gone and had become frustrated and angry.  Admittedly, Eddie was kind of a klutz, but even this didn't explain the coldness in her voice now.  Of course, the affection had also gone away also.  The kissing and touching came less and less often until a few months ago when it seemed to have disappeared completely.  Eddie had his suspicions about what could have caused the decline of their relationship, but none of that mattered now.  The relationship was gone, as was Terra.
 Eddie sighed and got up from the bed to turn on the TV.  "Back to the Future" was on.  It was the scene where Marty first traveled back into the past.  Eddie kind of envied Marty being able to go back and make his parents lives better.  He wished he could go back and find out for sure where things had gone wrong.  Eddie pulled his gaze from the TV and gazed around the room.  Looking at his dresser, he realized he was going to have alot of work to do if he was going to put thoughts of Terra out of his mind entirely.  Traces of her were scattered all over his dresser in the form of little knickknacks.  Pressed into the corner of the dresser where it fit against the corner of his room was a little stuffed Build-A-Bear that played "Bed of Roses" by Bon Jovi.  Now that Eddie thought about it, that was a terrible romantic song.  He remembered a lyric about sleeping on a bed of nails.  Sounded painful to Eddie.  Gee, he thought, maybe those guys knew more about love than I knew.  In the middle was the goofy plastic daisy picture frame that still held the first picture of herself she had sent him when they were 14 years old.  Looking at it hurt Eddie's heart.  He could easily see the woman she had become over time in her face.  Eddie wouldn't be surprised if he could see a picture of her 30 years from now and still recognize her.  A little to the right of the frame was two sets of tickets: one from the movie they went to on that trip to meet Terra and the other from their first movie together in Mistcastle.  Eddie looked a little to the left of the frame and saw...a blurry red blob?  He reached up and ran his finger under his right eye.  It came away wet.  Very wet.  Eddie looked in the mirror and saw some vague watery shadow staring back at him from a million tiny crystals.  Outside, thunder crashed louder than before and the rain started coming down even harder than before.  Eddie stared back at the mirror, into the millions of crystals.  His lips were turned down into a mournful frown.  His eyes were bloodshot red and full of water.  His hair had become a complete rat's nest on top of his head.  Eddie couldn't really remember the last time he had brushed his hair...or his teeth for that matter.  Sometime before he saw Terra last, but he had shut himself down pretty well since then.  
 Eddie tilted his head to the left and suddenly, felt something snap.  Not like some mornings when his back would crack as he stretched and yawned when he got out of bed, or when he would straighten his left arm out sometimes and his elbow would pop.  No, even though he thought he could hear a snap in his head, it wasn't something physical.  Eddie shook his head trying to get his bearings, but he knew it was something in his mind that had finally let go and snapped.  Eddie's eyes drew up to his reflection once again, but of their own will, at least it seemed to him.  He saw the right side of his mouth curl up into a sneer while every muscle in his body seemed to draw tight.  His eyes cast downward again to the surface of his dresser and saw his little blue worry rock with its polished smooth surface.  Eddie picked it up in his right hand and ran his thumb in circles along the grooved underside.  It was supposed to be something that relieved stress, which was why he had bought it at the local college's gift shop while his science class had been on a field trip.  Terra was in that class too, he remembered, and started circling his thumb faster along the rock.  He would do this sometimes to get his head right, like before a big test or, lately, after whatever fight Terra picked that day.  Eddie stared at the spotted green surface of the rock for what seemed like hours but finally had to blink slowly.  While his eyes were closed, he heard glass shatter, though it sounded like it had come from another room.  
 When Eddie's eyes came open, he saw his right arm extended out in front of him and his mirror shattered into a thousand pieces over all of the little knickknacks and mementos spread over his dresser.  The bear was now wearing a shiny cap of starlit sparkles, reflecting the light from the lamp overhead.  His hand moved in slow motion back down to his side.  Eddie took in the destruction that he had caused and it occurred to him that he had never intentionally broken a thing in his life.  Sure, he had put a baseball through the living room window once while he was practicing out beside the house, but that ball had just gotten away from him.  This...well, this was very different from that.  Even if he couldn't remember throwing the rock, he knew that he had meant to do it.  And what was worse, he liked it.  He could feel a cold smile creeping onto his lips.  But that was as far as it went.  His eyes remained dead and cold.  He wanted more.  More destruction.  More anger.  More hate.   Eddie threw his arms forward and swept the contents of the dresser onto the floor with a crash.  His hands stung a little where the larger pieces of glass bit into his hands, but Eddie barely felt it.  He grabbed the teddy bear off the floor beside the closet.  It was playing that stupid song again.  Eddie drop-kicked it into the wall by his bedroom door.  The rage Eddie felt overwhelmed all of Eddie's senses.  Eddie knew he must be seeing things, because for a moment, he felt almost like he was glowing a deep blood-red, like some kind of visible aura around his body.  He grabbed the television off the wall and tossed it at the teddy bear on the other side of the room.  Eddie took a step backwards to admire his handywork, not noticing that the daisy frame had fallen to the floor behind him.  Eddie stepped on the frame and stumbled backwards, losing his balance.  He tried to catch himself, but he was starting to fall.  The corner of the bed caught him in the back of the leg and he flew backwards and crashed through the closet door, his vision fading to black as he lost consciousness.

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