Of Remembrance in The Book Of Everything

And here I am again. Like, four + months since my last entry. I lasted a whopping two entries. Well, better pick it right back up.

Sometimes, I find myself wandering into my parents’ bedroom, having to pick up some clothes or open up the window to let some fresh air in. There’s a digital frame there, showcasing a stream of photos. One photo in particular always picks up my curiosity and makes me stand there for a good minute. It shows me and my mother sitting at a restaurant’s table. It must be from over 7 or 8 years ago.

I see myself and just how bad I looked. I was the most overweight I have ever been in my life. The sweater I was wearing could not hide how badly out of shape I was. I had the ugliest pair of glasses I could have possibly worn and absolutely not made for the shape of my face. They were also slightly crooked, they were not going straight across my eyes. To top it all off, I had some of that stubble typical of teens wanting to see what their facial hair was like.

But then I notice, I was smiling. It looks like an earnest smile, honestly. And when I see that smile I can’t help but get teary eyed. I am happy that, regardless of all, I was happy. It’s one of those photos that makes you think you’ve been already in existence for a hot minute.