I woke up this morning feeling pretty good, but I’m annoyed that it is Sunday already. I really don’t feel like going back to work tomorrow. Not because I want to sit at home and do nothing, but I just feel like that’s what I should be doing right now.
Me and an extremely thin skeleton crew are the only ones who have even been showing up for work because they offered paid time off to people who have children and can’t find daycare. Almost everyone took advantage of this; even people who have full-grown adult kids! Actually “even” isn’t the proper word - ESPECIALLY people with full-grown adult offspring. People are enjoying paid fucking vacations. I argued to some co-workers that it’s not really right for the company to only offer this type of help to people who have kids. I said there are things that I would like to take care of personally during this time that would help alleviate my anxieties. They looked at me like I had two heads. I have a feeling I will be one of the only assholes showing up for work again this week. I don’t have enough seniority at this place to cause any fuss.
It’s not just work that has been annoying me lately either. It’s a lot of things.
Sconer Facetime’d me last night with his kids. It was nice to see them. I mentioned to him that I’m slightly annoyed that I’m not included in the stimulus check money because I had a good year in 2018. A lot has changed since then. I changed jobs twice because of a catastrophic explosion that caused the refinery to close down last June and made me lose my job. I’ve had a rough time since then with money.
I was actually expecting Sconer to relate to me with the stimulus check issue because I know he probably made about the same amount of money as me in 2018. He told me he is actually going to be a pretty big stimulus check because he is married and has three kids.
I personally don’t agree with the way they decided to distribute the money. The cut-off amount is just an arbitrary amount in my opinion. Making $75,000-$90,000 in New Jersey is NOT the same as $75,000-$90,000 in East Bumble-fuck, North Dakota. In New Jersey that amount is just enough to get you into middle class. Whatever though. I’m happy for the the people who are getting it and I hope that it does help some people out of a jam.
I’m just overall annoyed by a lot. I would love to just hibernate until things were back to normal again.
Even yesterday I was out driving and it annoyed me to see how long the line of cars was at Taco Bell. Why the fuck is Taco Bell even open right now? And why are so many people going. If one person at Taco Bell gets the virus then they are basically handing out a free side order of Coronavirus with every meal they sell. CLOSE THE FUCKING PLACE.
I’ve been trying to recognize that some of the things that I’m annoyed by are irrational, but even if I’m successful at convincing myself this - The feeling of annoyance doesn’t actually go away.
I still don’t feel 100% health-wise. I can’t really pin point what is wrong with me. It’s prob a collaboration of a bunch of things.