One Angry Dwarf ⋅ 120

I AM AN ETERNAL MONSTER OF LIGHT

"i can't think of anything but butt jokes"

dude who can't think of anything but butt jokes

Entries 59

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This morning I put cinnamon and nutmeg in my coffee and thought “huh i guess i’m pretending it’s christmas time” and then I got the song “DO THEY KNOW IT’S CHRISTMAS TIME AT AALLLLLL” stuck in my...


(memoir title right tharrrrrrr.) Okay here are the pictures from the scavenger hunt! Make a household object into your quarantine friend, a la Wilson in Castaway: “Hatti Potterson,” made by Zeld...


HI EVERYONE. This weekend was fucking weird. Did a “scavenger hunt” on Saturday with Zardoz, Zelda and Beyonce (new coworker who loves Beyonce, my nicknames get less creative with each passing da...


20: Now: (why yes i AM very productive when i’m working from home, why do you ask)


I don’t really know… how to write anymore? Somehow, despite sitting at the same laptop and doing the same work, my routine of “oh hey it’s mid-morning, time to ignore my job and write an entry in...


Y’all are the fucking best. I’ma individually respond to stuff when I have the emotional energy, but today I’ve hardly even thought about it which is definitely very good for my brain, so I’ma ke...


Christ. I told Zardoz I’d work on creating an RPG with him. The concept is awesome. He’s built an entire world already. But the document I’m meant to read and comment on is 47 pages long and I wa...


Hi. What a fuckin’ week. I’m going to try to round up the positive, here: I’ve learned that I can work from home. I used to not be able to do that At Fucking All, but it turns out I can if I ha...


HOW IS EVERYONE DOING TODAY?!? This is a genuine question, feel free to answer in comments! YOU DON’T HAVE TO THOUGH. Maybe I’ll just turn my PB into housebound selfies since I don’t wanna get s...


but with better hair this time


Instead here’s a picture of me pretending to be an old-timey accountant. K BYE.


Oh, no one? Oh. Nah, I’m okay. I’ve had much, much worse hangovers in my life. But still, working from home with a hangover makes it a little too easy to take naps, and I’m trying to be a respons...


HI EVERYONE. LOOK AT ME, UPDATING AGAIN. I feel like it’s been a while since daily updates were a thing? And by “a while” I mean “probably upwards of a week” because my concept of time is all kin...


I DIDN’T DIE FROM KRATOM, PLEASE TRY TO CONTAIN YOUR DISAPPOINTMENT. It was okay, actually! I took a total of.... I think 3.5 grams? It felt kinda like I’d had too much coffee, a little? I tried ...


What color is your toothbrush? Black. Name one person who made you smile today: Other City Coworker. What were you doing at 8 am this morning? Riding the bus to stupid work. What were you doing 4...


I’ve been having such a hard time writing lately. Which is very fucking unusual for me. I’ll go through (brief) phases where I don’t even try to write, usually because I’m very depressed or anxi...


A WEEKEND ENTRY? WHAT? WHAT IS THIS MADNESS. I woke up at 12 fucking 30 fucking P fucking M yesterday. I slept for, according to my Fitbit, 10 hours. I was in bed for 12. I still felt sluggish an...


I need to learn how to type using home row holy fuck it is hard. This is going to take a lifetime to retrain myself but it’ll make everything easier eventually. Fuuuuck this. I taught myself to t...


Fabletics is dumb. Hahaha fuck WHO INVENTED THIS BUSINESS MODEL. Okay so I signed up to get 2 pairs of workout pants for $24. I like the pants, and decided to let the subscription continue for on...


December 07, 2018

DePhoMo #5: Country Life in DePhoMo

I don’t live in the country, but I did take a picture of this painting in a bar once. I mean, I imagine that’s meant to be the country. #NotAllCountryBabies, obv. OR IS IT? No of course it’s not...


December 05, 2018

DePhoMo4: PATTERNS in DePhoMo

I’m trapped in a pattern of mutually enabled self-destruction with my MAYBE-BEST-FRIEND???-turned-boss. I regret nothing, except referring to him as a friend lol lol lol but no I love him more th...


lol CW: Dieting, weight loss, way cooler hair than I have now (this one’s just for me because seeing my old hair makes me sad)


THIS IS ABOUT DIET STUFF. HA HA OBVIOUSLY. . . . . . . . . . . . . K so the first couple weeks I had beer twice, regained 4 pounds. Got back down to where I was. Third week I had a milk shake, g...


Man. Yesterday was not super easy. I just wanted bread all goddamn day. It was maybe psychological, cos I finally decided to kick down my calorie count to actually LOSE weight instead of maintain...


CW - diet stuff, progress pics YEAH I’M QUOTING JOHN MAYER IN MY TITLE, WHAT OF IT. I’ve actually had a couple John Mayer lyrics floating through my head lately. “HEAVIER THINGS” HOLDS UP PRETTY...


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