23/12/2023
Tomorrow is Christmas night, I am thousand of feets away from home, I miss the Christmas vibe, our Christmas rituals, I am sad and alone sitting in the dark with my Christmas lights, drowning in on ocean of thoughts
See the thing is I discovered it lately, unfortunately, I was so heart broken by them, by my parents that I choose to leave and be else where far away from them, I lived in places insecure with no food no rooftop, I put myself in suffering, I thought that will reduce my pain, but it didn’t at all, I still miss them and want to be around them, with all the hurt. My past still hunt me. I thought I was over it, I thought that I was okey, but I am far from that and it’s been almost a year, a year is enough to turn every light of hope off, even though I refused to surrender but I did eventually. I was a fighter I was a survivor but the waves was so big that it crushed everything in the way, leaving me with a breath, only a breath, only breathing, I was nothing yet breathing, I lost the identity of who I truly am, or want to be. Can we call that being alive?!