Entries 117
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My emotions shocked me..
So I had tbe ultra sound yesterday.. She said I was having a girl. I made her check again 4 times. She said she’s positive. I am scared shitless.. But let’s just talk about my hour long session o...
If the heart wants..
What it wants, I think it should be required to explain itself. I have no gosh darn clue why I can’t get him off my mind. He is a giant piece of poop. For real. And yet? I think about him sometim...
If the heart wants..
What it wants, I think it should be required to explain itself. I have no gosh darn clue why I can’t get him off my mind. He is a giant piece of poop. For real. And yet? I think about him sometim...
Let's just acknowledge
How fucking great Harry Potter is. 😍😍😍
You.. And baby
I was sifting through all the bull shit you told me I my mind. “We’ll get through this.” “We’ll figure this out.” “I’m here for you.” “You can trust me.” Oh, the list goes. I wish I could just ge...
When
Will it be my time to shine? My time for happiness? Will I truly love myself? Ugh
I do it to myself..
I’m kind of sad tonight. I’m kind of in my feels tonight. I didn’t plan on this kid. I always said if I ever had another, I’d be in a good situation. I’ve never been alone before in a pregnancy....
May have finalized
Me doing this all by myself.. I really didn’t want to waste my breath going off on him.. But these damn hormones. I basically told him that I thought it would be great to just party it up with my...
What I'd like to say..
I want to start of by asking you why? Why would you tell me the things you did? Why would you hold me while I cried? Why would you brush my hair away and tell me that we would figure it all out? ...
The upside..
I’m alive. My kids are healthy and happy.. Well, Kanen has a cough. But you know! We got a new house. It’s more space.. More room, but we have more roommates, too. 5 bedrooms. 5 kids and 3 adults...
Some type of way.
Life. Got me down. Stressed to the max. The usual. Ugh.
Nerves are real.
So no time for a long entry, but of course I’ll be writing a follow up message soon. Life got hard. I suck at adulting and taking care of myself. I need money and quick.. So tonight will be my fi...
Pick your purse up.
And stuff those shitty feelings right back in there, kid! Ugh i turned 27 yesterday. Shit. That sucks lol. I look at my life and can’t help but ask myself how the fuck i got here… This is NOT how...
We've come a long way..
Geez.. It’s been some time. I’d like to tell you that I figured everything out, and I’m on my way to a much merrier life… But that would be a lie. Truth be told.. I’m no closer than I was in my l...
Oh, perspective.
I’ve decided that I can’t change who I’ve been or what I’ve done. No matter how long I sit on something and obsess over how it could have been different.. If only I made the “right”decisions.. I ...
Druunnnnkkkkkk
Yeahhhhh :)))
Fuckity, Fuck.
So I’m divorced! As of the 6th. We got an agreement to go along with uncontested divorce. He got caught cheating on his new gf.. Well, trying mostly. With me… And now he wants no parts of the agr...
Father's Day drama...
So I didn’t call my step dad… I feel bad. But not bad enough to call him… Maybe next year? Steve. Of course we HAD to have drama today. I’ll just post screenshots, it’s easier. I’m tired ...
Vent time!!!
So the ex. Oh. My. God. He seriously drives me absolutely insane. He hasn’t seen the kids in forever because I’m uncomfortable with his living situation. Yeah, I’ve offered to meet up somewhere, ...
Depression sucks
Having no job. No car. No money. No life. Shit is really taking a toll on me. I’m sinking into a big depression. There is not really anything in life I enjoy right now. My kids just do fucked up...
Oh, yeah &&.
I forgot to mention that besides my ex being a difficult, raging douche… I’m getting closer to my goal weight!!! I am 163.0! I am so close to my goal weight! So there’s that.. The things that ma...
Happiness...
Why can’t I be happy alone?!? They, whoever the fuck they is/are, say happiness is what you make it… I WANT to be happy though. Maybe I don’t?? Maybe I like being miserable deep down?? The divorc...
To be loved..
That’s all.
Writing through it.
I’m an open person and talk about all kinds of things to all kinds of people.. But when it comes to what’s deep inside, I can only write about it. I’m going to kill myself, but I just can’t let g...
Fuck you, feelings.
Argh. I’m so lost and confused as to what to do with Steven… I feel it is best to cut of ALL contact with him unless having to do with kids. I’ll NEVER be more than a fuck. Never will be, never ...
