Riding in a car when I was a child, I was usually stuffed in the corner of a compact car, or splayed across the laps of at least two of my 15 siblings’ laps. I could see the road signs from the angle I was at, half way down the backside of the drivers or passengers seat, and by the turns and speed of the car, I knew where we were on our journey to or from church or a gathering. My family, including al extended relatives and elders, were close and celebrated feasts of patron saints with tons of food and togetherness. So of course, all those in our home would attend. Sometimes having to caravan with two or three Toyota Corollas, Toyota pickups. Sweet memories but of course sweating on your siblings bony knees didn’t make for a smooth, fun ride. But the windows would be rolled down, ocean breezes would whip our long hair and slap the brother or sister within in target range on their faces. I’d find my comfort zone to dull my thoughts that included, it sucks to be one of the younger ones, the older siblings got to sit in the seats. Coconut trees, flame trees, houses were visible to me. And the there were the signs. The road signs. Yellow, triangle-shaped with black lettering, “SOFT SHOULDERS” I never asked anyone what it meant. In one instance of my childlike innocence, I remember placing my cupped hand under my t-shirt to feel my shoulders. Could it mean you must have soft shoulders to travel along this two-lane potholed road? I left it at that never to ask any of my older siblings for fear of humiliating knee-jerk reactions from them. Years and years later, living on the mainland, traveling hundreds of miles, road construction projects on many of those rides, it came to me! Driving along, having to pull off the freeway for whatever reason (probably to pee), and there was the sign, SOFT SHOULDERS! A good friend of mine who lived stateside for many years, suggested I pull over carefully when leaving the asphalt, for the transition required careful navigation to land transition from smooth asphalt to a steep dip onto the shoulders of the road. I quietly laughed to myself, never ever sharing this story, until now. There is room for disaster or damage to the vehicle pulling over onto unpaved, dusty, crusty roadsides. Veering off of a smooth journey during life, leaves us no choice when there is an emergency (crisis, life changing and vents), requires careful, loose hands while steering, then hold your breath on the dip, allow yourself the brief pause off the course, and bear down on the shoulders for a soft landing. The road is still there, life and others are still moving on by, and sometimes there are reminders along the way. How to navigate your way to take a break from the what you’re navigating, is permissible. The signs are there, your muscle memory kicks in and holding still waiting to expel that breath after a dip in the road, will be gentler for you in lieu of Road Closed. The shoulders are in close proximity to getting back on the road. And when you are ready to get back on the road, punch it!