Entries 12

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I have this pain between my temples and my only thought of remedy is putting a bullet through it. I can’t take it. Constant anger, feelings of bursting in tears. Every little thing hurts ment...

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Since my last post I’ve been feeling pretty good. No anger, feelings of rage, been pretty upbeat I believe. The last two days have been difficult. Everything had been setting me off and I’ve felt...

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Felt pretty good until right before lunch. I was promoted this week and start my new position tomorrow morning. Well, I had this job a few years ago so technically it’s not new. Anywho, an asso...

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Feeling good today. I woke up at 3:30 a.m. top get ready for work and I noticed something that I haven’t done in a while. I started straightening and organizing the cabinet I keep my meds in. I...

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Isn’t starting off well. I have the strong feeling of wanting to disappear. It’s still early though so I’m trying to stay calm and not burst into tears. I’ll update later.

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Today hasn’t been too terrible. I’m not feeling anything really. Just have no desire or motivation to do anything. To me, days like this are almost as bad as the days I’m just ready to set eve...

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Nothing....... Fuck this day..

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Day 2 of my meds and I woke up extremely horny. I remember dreaming about my wife and the build up to what would have been sex in my dream and then I woke up. The desire came to the conscious ...

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Saw a psychiatrist two days ago over my depression. Not even my wife knew how bad it was. Within the last month, when no one is home, I’ve sat on my bed holding my gun thinking of everything and ...

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I’m really trying to post often. I read a lot of entries but I’m always afraid to comment. My stupid brain thinks “What if im bothering them?” “What if they think im a weirdo for commenting on a...

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So, a lot of my depression over the last year is brought on from being laid off from my job that I had for almost 15 years. At the time I had a mixed set of emotions. Internally I was devastate...

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Here I am, sitting in my car, thinking of ending it all. I think about it quite regularly. I don’t think I could ever actually do it, but not out of fear, It bothers me thinking of how my famil...

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