Confusion is all that’s going through my head right now. I’ve recently made a huge decision in my life which I know is for the best but somehow still can’t shake it off. I recently found out I was pregnant but due to being in a really good place with my career just taking off I felt like for me and my partner that giving all that up to stay at home just wasn’t the right time for us. Part of me has desperately wanted a baby for so long but it actually becoming a reality hit me hard. I made the heartbreaking decision to have a termination, all I can’t explain is that it was probably the most hardest thing I have ever done and absolutely breaks my heart every single day, but I can not understand why I am feeling like this. I am ever so lucky to have the most amazing support from my partner who has been there for me every step of the way but my whole attitude towards it has completely changed. I see people in the streets or on social media who are pregnant or who have just had a baby, even some of my friends! And I can’t help but feel angry, bitter & heartbroken that it’s not me. I feel frightened to explain or mention this to anyone close to me as I feel I have no right to be sad as this was my decision after all but I feel like spilling this out anonymously may help with shaking off this feeling.