Entries 15

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i have feelings i can’t express. some because i’m censoring myself in nearly every aspect of my life. some because i don’t have the words for it. some because i’m so far from ready to put words t...

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uncle’s tumors are apparently numerous. at least one is wrapped completely around his spinal cord. regardless of anything else, this renders this new round of cancer inoperable. there is talk o...

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uncle gary has tumors on his spine. they don’t know what it is yet, but history and everything....yeah. sounds like it’s back. leisl’s invasive breast cancer has progressed. she will be takin...

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i am in a better place today. that’s not to say it’ll last, but i’m hopeful. today is about some fun. and errands. i am just glad i can run them…while my insurance fucks around, i am thankful for...

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they just keep coming. another friend fighting cancer has discontinued treatment, and is officially accepting palliative care in boston during her final days. please....no more....

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they denied the surgery again. said that the blood backflow rate wasn’t included in the report. ....wtf do they think the THREE ULTRASOUNDS were for! ? they MEASURE BACKFLOW. the first was the in...

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someone i’ve known a while has come forward with a tiny matter that we need to address. how, exactly, it will be addressed is, at the moment, undetermined. robert and i are friends. we talk reg...

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I was able to comfort him. I am still doing it, and he’s keeping me sane. Turns out i knew exactly what to do. hell, i even got him to sleep. :)

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i hate when i don’t know how to comfort him. …i really hate it.

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for the third time this year alone, a procedure my cardiologist wants me to have has been postponed. The insurance company says that they cannot approve the claim, and are requesting a peer-to-pe...

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I realized that i didn’t detail my Valentine’s day, and i should have. first, i worked. when i got through, i arrived at twitch’s house, where we had planned to drink a six pack and buck the trad...

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funny what will make you smile about another person. the way s/he interacts with children, for instance, or animals - especially those to whom they do not belong… also, he has sculpted his facial...

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one of my favorite things is when he closes and locks the bedroom door. he near-always gives me a dark, lustful look over his shoulder, that turns me into molten lava in seconds. last night was t...

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the day has been uneventful. we saw pops (his dad). he cooked (he is a chef). we hung out with his boys (12 and 14). i wore a stupid-sexy heart monitor and rather want to rip the flesh from my b...

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i’m sitting here listening to him play his war game, fly his helicopters, and shoot the enemy…just sitting here, watching his tv and drinking his coffee while the heart monitor does its thing. .....

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