Mistake, I am being mistaked and misunderstood, but what do I care, I stopped caring and started isolating myself because I cared too much, I cared not because I wanted to be loved, I wanted to be understood that I don’t want the company of people anymore, I don’t hate it, I just find it uncomfortable now, I used to be fine with it but I enjoy being alone, I planned to be weird, a creep, because I know there are two people that love me but all I want for them is to find other people that love them genuinely in return, but there are two people maybe 1, I am not sure because I felt relief that other found someone else, I don’t know why I acted hurt when I always see them together, to make her pride go up, to not hurt her I saw her face when acted normal so I thought I should act like that but she has the most affect in my life no not getting hurt because I love her and knowing the fact that she is with someone else no she has affected the things that I believed to, and the things that I wanted to do in my life and I don’t even want to remember why that’s why I isolated myself, the other girl that I know that still love me, I realize she is too nice for me, it’s not meant for me, my mother didn’t pay any attention or talk to me when I was a kid, I feel uncomfortable when someone cares for me, loves me, even when I showed them what I really am, but no I don’t like it, so I pretended to be a larper (larp means Live Action Role Playing, a person that pretends to be something, that can be anything which makes them untrustworthy because they pretend to know something or know what to do)I dont care if people are mad at me, I just wanted them to feel that I am untrustworthy of a person and they’ll stay away from me, I know that she has heard terrible stuff about but she still believes that I am a nice guy, a person that needs help, because I have been alone my whole life, I felt guilty and she doesn’t deserve me.I don’t know how to respond or what to say. I don’t know what to do in my situation right now.