Entries 1,407

Page 21 of 57

I’m back. Not in the best of spirits, but I’m home. Due to The Shocking Photo Incident of ‘08 (previous entry), I sent some emergency texts to TMG while I was gone. Guess who was waiting for ...

---

I’m in Milan. On a weird computer because mine doesn’t work in my room. I’m actually in a bar (there are computers set up here on the side) in the hotel. It’s morning here, and I hope I can ma...

---

I want to tell you a story, but I’m so exhausted (very long day), and I now have only 4 hours to sleep before I have to get up and pack and leave Paris for Milan. 2 days in Milan and the I’ll b...

---

It’s waaaaay past my bedtime if I want to do my awesome run at the Louvre in the morning, but I feel like writing. Today started out kinda weird (with the email and all–see previous entry), but...

---

…to wake up to this. I got an email from EXMS (no edits in grammar/spelling): “I hope you trip is going well. Things here in [our city] have been nice, the weather has been cooling down..alth...

---

…that will make you want to smack me around: I have been pathetically sad the last couple of days (yes, while I should be having the time of my life on my European travels) because after EXMS c...

---

Just back in from an almost-frosty run in Hyde Park and an even steamier, luscious shower. Oh my gawd, I did not want to get out of that heavenly warmth. Now I’m sitting on the sofa in my hote...

---

Just landed in London and checked into my hotel room. Trip is going well, thank you. Spent the last day and 1/2 in Copenhagen, and it was my first time there. It was lovely: Do you know what...

---

On a cramped plane bound for Copenhagen (via Frankfurt), I tap this out. This plane is freezing. And I mean teeth rattling frozen. Some nice man gave me his extra blanket, so I have three Luf...

---

Sorry I’ve been out of touch. But because of a very vivid dream I had maybe a couple of weeks ago, I think I’m going to have to go exclusively faves only. I dreamt that EXMS found my diary and ...

---

You knew it would get complicated, didn’t you. DIDN’T YOU??!! Why didn’t you TELLL MEEE??? (oh, right.) So much going on. So very, very much. I owe you the following things: What’s ha...

---

TMG burned a mixed CD for me and gave it to me last night. It’s the most thoughtful thing I think anyone’s given me in a long, long time. He named it “The Beauty in Ugly” and there are 18 song...

---

OK. Decision made. I’m NOT going the meds route unless (UNLESS!) I spiral into some kind of freakish depression where I don’t want to get out of bed or talk to people or if I can’t stop crying...

---

I’m sucking at updating lately. The dumb thing is, I know that writing helps me get things out and also helps to put things in perspective. AND it just plain makes me feel better. To me, it’s...

---

…come in the mail: Modern Bride magazine, letters that are addressed to Mr. and Mrs. [Ginger Snap], old mail for EXMS that were from the old, …hang on the wall: …decorate the loft: …make me...

---

I’ve been silent, yes. Because there hasn’t been a whole lot to say that you don’t already know. And wallowing in sorrow is so, so tiring and boring. So. What’s been going on in addition to ...

---

No, I am not the person I thought I’d be today. I am trying really, really hard not to dwell on this as a loss. I’ve read and heard and listened to everything I can possibly get my hands on or...

---

---

I’m still having a really, really tough time. This is the week I was supposed to marry (now 3 days away). I am searching for relief. I found this article tonight and I liked it so much, I wan...

---

And now. To counterbalance all the blucky schmudge, I present you with some GOOD. Whenever I’m feeling low, low, LOW, someone has always been around to keep me from simply slipping into a chas...

---

I don’t know. It makes me feel icky and black to write disparaging things, but these are the things I’m going through right now, and it has to come out. I have to get it out somehow, but I jus...

---

…I loved him so much more than he loved me. So, so much. There’s a LOT going on in here. I just don’t have time or energy or the presence of mind to write it out just yet. * EDIT* Wait. Ju...

---

…are much better than others. Today/yesterday–not so much.

---

Today’s Obligatory Blue Thought (sorry, these are gonna come out alllll over the place…until I’m done): Did you know that I’d already changed my name? Not only in my mind. Not only did I prac...

---

EXMS put his profile back on match.com. Still with the photo that shows 1/3 of me. Still with the bullshit about how he’s ready for a serious relationship. This time I’m not shocked, but I ca...

---