Catch-Up in 2019

• Everything hurts. Maybe it’s because of the almost constant rainy weather we’ve had, maybe it’s because I’m getting older, or maybe it’s because I’m still overweight. Who knows? What I do know is that my right knee hurts, my back hurts, my left hip hurts, and my left foot hurts. My effing back though… hurts 24/7.
• I feel like I could sleep for a week. I am and stay exhausted.
• Sam and I got in a pretty bad fight a couple of weekends ago. I overreacted and “started it”, but he has to know how sensitive this subject is for me. Does he care?
• On the same subject, someone else announced today. I am happy for them, but it just hurts.
• Sam got a raise at work. It is well deserved, but not enough to make a huge difference in our lives. It might be an extra $200 each month after taxes. $60 of that will pay for SQ’s braces, so it’s nice that we aren’t having to scramble to come up with that.
• I’ve been busting ass at work. I’ve worked long hours, done hours of research, etc. Last week, I submitted a grant request for $15,000 for our Veteran program. This week, I am working on a grant for $20,000 for Bereavement. Several weeks ago, I submitted a grant request for $1,000 for Charity Care. A month ago, I submitted a $25,000 grant request for Music Therapy. Here’s to hoping I can help make a difference. I’ve also been taking on more and more responsibility. I truly do a little bit of everything here and it feels good to feel needed. I never felt truly needed at the Senate. Also, I got to pick out our Tree of Remembrance quote this year. It is, “In Memory of a Life so Beautifully Lived and a Heart so Deeply Loved.” <3
• We’ve been working a side job every Saturday since March. We clean a 3 story beach house that sleeps 26 people in 4 hours. To say it is a marathon is putting it lightly. It is exhausting. We’re throwing around the idea of cleaning on Saturdays and Sundays until November to give us more spending/fun money for our honeymoon. The thought of this makes me want to stay under the covers instead of getting out of bed. I am certain that it’s contributing to my back hurting 24/7 too.
• It is 4:14 and I’m trying to make it until 5:00. I may duck out at 4:30 because OMG all I want to do is relax on my couch with my dog. I think I’m so miserable and grumpy today because I am trying hard to limit my Tylenol usage. I wish I could take ibuprofen…. It works so much better than Tylenol.
• I have gained 30 pounds back that I’d lost in 2016/17. sigh I feel like weight gain is a reason I feel so shitty, but a part of me feels like I am eating terribly because I feel so shitty.
• My mom and I had a big fight. I don’t have the energy to go into it because it is just the same old thing. I truly have to keep her at arm’s length for my sanity and that makes me sad.
• I made it til 4:22. Time to go!