Questions from the Other Side of the World in Things That I'm Grateful For

1. Do you have any nicknames?
   I have so many nicknames that my friend Billy Francesca, a West Hollywood legend, told me that I had more aliases and alter-egos than he did and that meant I was either a serial killer or a performer. Now, my students call me Mr. J

2. Are you named after anyone?
   I have no idea and it’s honestly none of my business.

3. Do you have any siblings?
   Austin, Cameron, Dayton, Chuckie and Alexah, while Evan is basically my adopted little brother because I have more in common with him anyway (it was strange the last couple of years going to bars with my little brother and partying with him).

4. Where did you grow up?
   What gives you the impression I ever grew up? I grew up in a suburb of the capitol of California in a mostly-white neighborhood that wasn’t mostly-white but people like to say that in hindsight because they deride the direction the community has taken in the last 20 years. California has just as much bigotry as the rest of the country, except ours is in the North.

5. What activities did you do in high school?
   By the time high school came around, I had already been performing in bars for years so I did theater but not often because it interfered with my shows at the bars. At the time, I thought I was doing a ton of stuff, but really, I managed to be pretty balanced. Much more balanced and able to manage my time and energies than I am now. I was much much smarter when I was 16 than I am at 38.

6. Where did you go to college?
   Cal Poly Pomona

7. What activities did you do in college?
   What is your weird obsession with activities? None, I was in my thirties by the time I got to college.... Wait, I shouldn’t say that. I forgot about the first couple of years at college. I always forget about them because I was still doing stand-up at that time. The first couple of years, when I was at community college, I would go to classes Monday thru Thursday and then hop a flight Thursday night, do shows over the weekend (as well as homework) and take a Sunday red-eye. I did that for two-and-a-half years before I finally retired and then shortly afterward studied abroad in Paris. During that same two plus years, I was elected President of the college’s Gay-Straight Alliance and French clubs. I had large administrative teams and ruled with an iron fist. But it taught me a few things… 1. I should never be in charge of things even if I am an effective leader 2. People like the idea of democracy but don’t understand how it essentially prevents progress or the achievement of any tasks whatsoever. That was all at community college, so once I got to Cal Poly, I refused to participate in anything because I was exhausted. 16-year-old me would not have let myself get that over-extended, but twenty-five-year-old me assumed he could do it all.

8. What did you study in college?
   I have degrees in Public Relations - Public Speaking, French, Queer Theory and ESL

9. What was your first job out of college?
   Obviously this was written with people who got out of college at twenty-two in mind. I did logistical accounting for Saks Fifth Avenue after graduation… but I had fifteen years of working experience by that point.

10. What kind of music do you like?
    I like most all music. I have taken a very much-needed break from music since arriving in Thailand because I’ve realized how toxic and polarizing music culture is nowadays. I can’t just enjoy things any longer, I have to form an opinion and have a critical analysis and discuss it.... shut up. I haven’t bought the new Madonna, LeAnn Rimes, Stevie Nicks, Harry Styles or Beyonce albums… and I’m perfectly okay with that for now.

11. What’s one hobby that you’d like to take up?
    I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately, things that remain unfinished. I’ll keep you updated on this because now I finally have time and space and energy and no pressure.

12. What did you think you wanted to be when you grew up?
    I wanted to be like my grandfather. I idolized him so I wanted to be a clergyman like him. He was a charismatic Christian pastor. In fact, while other kids were playing cops and robbers, I was playing “Preacher.” My grandfather got endless joy out of it, and it was his favorite story to tell about me… he told it to me in the last conversation we had before he died, “You were a little five-year-old boy who took his hat and held it in front of people waiting for the offering, and you wouldn’t move it until they put in some coins. It was the funniest thing I’d ever seen!” The repetition of his stories used to irritate me but now I’m quite sad that I’ll never hear him tell them again. I’m grateful I heard them as many times as I did.

13. What’s the biggest project on your to-do list right now?
    I have more small things to accomplish than I really can possibly handle, but that’s what happens when you move ha!

14. Do you have any irrational fears?
    Irrational fears? Spoons

15. Have you ever traveled outside the country? If so, where?
    I am a citizen of the planet so I have no answer to your question.

16. When’s your next vacation and where are you going?
    I’m planning a trip to Singapore for my birthday because I’ve taken time off for it and it’s a 2 hour flight… and my grandfather always told me it was one of his favorite places.

17. Do you speak any other languages?
    We already went over this… But learning Thai is one of my “hobby I’d like to take up”

18. What’s one talent that you wish you had?
    Talent has never been my problem. I’ve always been bursting at the seams with talent. I could use stable mental health haha

19. What’s something that you wish you could do one more time?
    I wish I could have spent more time with my siblings when they were children. I really fucked up when I decided to go out into the wide world and leave them behind. He says, writing from an apartment in Bangkok on the other side of the world.

20. If you weren’t in your current job, what would you want to be doing?
    I spent an inordinate amount of time trying every career I could possibly do because I was almost sure that this wasn’t the job for me… but it is. It utilizes every one of my skills and talents, it challenges me, and I get to unleash all the emotions and protectiveness that pulses under the surface every day. I am where I am supposed to be.

Last updated August 28, 2022