i want to be good in normalizing the authentic

i want to be a good and virtuous person. i want to be pure to the core, not rotten and evil. i want to be open to the experiences others can give me, i want to be selfless in a way that doesn’t sacrifice my own sanity. i want to derive pleasure from selflessness. the first step to being virtuous is to stop hating myself so much. forgive myself for all my imperfections, laziness, sins. be happy for simply existing. i want to stop emulating other people and to be my true self, even if i dont even know what that consists of. just explore the mysteriousness of being