This is kind of new. Today I’m writing this entry while I sit at my daughter’s meeting. She’s in a program that is kind of like girl scouts, but religious. My husband was home today (school was cancelled) so he has my other kids, leaving me ample opportunity to do work alone here in the lobby. It’s kind of a treat not to have to take care of the other 2 while I’m here. Although people keep trying to recruit me to come help with their classes since they are short on volunteers. No thanks, I don’t like kids. One teacher was like “You’re still working!? At this hour?!” Uhm, yeah, Sharon, mind your biz. I’m 99.7% sure she has no clue what I do for a living. For all she knows this is my normal working hours like half of America.
My daughter has a camping trip coming up. I hate camping. I don’t want to go. And the treasurer mentioned that she’s old enough to camp there alone now. Umm what. I am going to see how she feels about it. It cost 36 extra dollars for me to go camp (26 for me to become a member and 10 for the trip). I could have probably saved that money but I am worried she will get scared at the last moment and not want me to leave her. She hasn’t stayed without me anywhere before except her aunts house. She’s at a really weird season in her life where she has a bit of anxiety. Plus shes not fully night trained at 7 years old so I don’t want her to pee and get embarrassed. I would suggest a pullup, but would that be embarrassing. Momming her is hard. My son? Pffft. He leaves me for a week at a time every year to go to Diabetes camp hours away and doesn’t bat an eye.
I’m so frustrated with my weight loss. It’s just not happening for me no matter how hard I try. I went through a couple days of bad depression. I resolved to take myself off my meds (all 3 have side effects that include weight gain), and am on a 1000 calories a day diet now. I started today and this is my plan.
8am- 160 calorie protein shake/ drink half
9-930- Walk around the neighborhood
10am- Diet soda
12am- 160 calorie protein shake/ drink half
1-130- Walk around the neighborhood
2pm- Sugar Free Jello
4pm- Start making dinner/ eat 700-900 calories, finish eating for the night by 6
Also, drink 64 oz of water throughout the day.
If I don’t lose weight after a couple weeks of this, I literally give up. I’ll just be fat. All of the dieting stress is messing me up big time with my depression.