So You Want To Go To A Swinger Party... in You can Haz Entries

The party was…surreal.

I walked in and was greeted by the doorman, who checked my name off the list and ran through the rules with me. As I looked to my right, there was a man with his face buried between a woman’s legs on an air mattress in the living room.

The hostess greeted me and introduced me to a bunch of people. Some weren’t clothed. I could hear noises all around me, and decided to investigate.

The house had no AC, it was warm out even though it was dark, and there were at least 30 people crammed into the house. I broke a sweat just standing around.

At the end of the hallway, there were two bedrooms. I walked over to check them out and saw that they were full of people. Bodies writhing, moans - and some screams - coming from various parts of each room. It was hard to see; the lights were all dimmed except in the public areas (the kitchen and dining room), so I had no idea who was fucking whom. I was told there were single guys and single women there, but in the midst of it all, I couldn’t tell who was with whom, as the couplings seemed to interchange throughout the course of the evening.

At first, it was sensory overload. There was so much going on, it took me a few minutes to get my head straight. Once I was able to suss things all, it became much more enjoyable.

I adhered strictly to the rules. If you’re going to watch, don’t linger. You don’t want anyone feeling uncomfortable. Not just that, but you don’t want to be a creeper, especially if you’re a single guy.

Full Disclosure: I’m not single. Socks and I are still living together. When I got the invite to the party, I told her about it, and she said as long as I didn’t partake, she was fine with me going.

For those who were on a break or not playing, the dining room and back patio were full of people chatting and hanging out. A few people nonchalantly walked around with no clothes. It’s interesting, shaking a person’s hand when they’re stark naked. I can’t make this shit up, folks.

At one point, I was in the living room. On one couch, people were having a conversation. on another, a woman was lying down, recovering from a lengthy session. on the third, two people were fucking each other silly. Both air mattresses were occupied, and there was a threesome on yet another couch about a foot and a half from me. Not gonna lie, gang. It was crazy hot to watch all that.

My inner voyeur was, needless to say, overloaded with data that night.

I stayed for a couple of hours, bid the hostess farewell, and made my way home.

As much fun as it was, when you’re not part of the action, it feels like being in a candy store with no money, so to speak.

I told Socks about it when I got home. She asked if I would go again if given the opportunity.

I’m pretty sure I would.

Last updated July 26, 2017