Wherein I rant about "fate". in The Big, Blue House, year one.

So my favorite niece posts a LOT of cheesy, quasi-inspirational memes. “Step by step you’ll get there”, “You get what you focus on, so focus on what you want”, “Just try to understand that everything happens for a reason”, “I see a certain life for myself and I won’t stop until I get it”, “If you pay close attention to the patterns of your life, you’ll realize everything always works out”, “Everything is aligning for you, trust it”, and my personal favorite for the day, “What’s meant for you will flow into your life effortlessly, you don’t have to stress, worry, chase, or fight for it”.

I want to keep her in my life, so I can try to help her however I can, so I’m just going to type here what I’d LIKE to type at her.

Anton LaVey said “Water rises to its own level”. He believed in meritocracy. Which is a portion of the truth at least. The family you’re born into, (and how wealthy they are, and what schools you can therefore attend), your health, your neurology, your upbringing, above all I think your skill at social engineering and your connections, and to some extent pure dumb luck; all influence where you wind up. Good choices are number one, and your ability to make those is dependent on so many things. Surviving as a human being is a complicated process, and whether you reach your goals is both a gamble and a tightrope challenge.

But one thing I can guarantee has absolutely no bearing on it whatsoever are supernatural influences.

She respects me. She loves me. She sees me as a success.

And of course Don and I are indeed witches. Legal clergy even. I cast spells. But I haven’t really believed in it in ages. I keep it up now out of principle, mostly. And because it’s just fun. That’s another entry.

So she thinks witchcraft got us where we are, because … I have no idea. To her that seems like the most reasonable explanation I guess?

How we got to where we are:

One: I was fired from my job in Evansville when we got a new manager who didn’t like me. Fearing homelessness, I called the few friends and relatives I was close to. One, an internet friend I met through a pagan podcast and forum, came with her van and took us to her house, in Toledo, Ohio. I had/made a good friend.

Two: Having several cats, I had to find housing that would let me keep them. Having bad credit at the time, from unpaid bills because I’d lost my job, I had to find a landlord who didn’t mind that. So we took a house that I found on Craigslist. I googled the landlord, and found he’d been convicted of real estate fraud in Indiana, where he’d acted as a property manager then rented the houses without the owner’s knowledge, and pocketed the rent. So I knew something similar would happen to us, but we had no options that I could see. After living there for two months, the real home owners showed up. They were surprised to find us there, so I showed them the rent receipts. The house had a rickety bathroom floor and a leaky kitchen roof, which made it illegal to rent, so they hired contractors to fix it. Said contracted repair guys basically ripped them off, only doing some of the work, and leaving the bathtub leaning against the dining room wall. - So they GAVE us that house. My unwillingness to part with my cats, and pure, dumb luck. Addendum: Always do background checks on your employees.

Three: Don worked while I filed, and appealed, and appealed some more, and went to several doctors, psychiatrists, and specialists, taking medications that usually only made me worse, to accumulate medical records for the judge, and eventually was approved for SSI. With PIPP and HEAP and MPAP and the Homeowner’s Deduction our total bills were $170 a month, and our groceries we buy with SNAP. So we saved a lot of money, rebuilt our credit, and generally lived very comfortably, with Don on Social Security now, and myself on SSI. Hard work and hardship, and not giving up.

Four: The block we lived on went to crap. Homeless people started squatting in the house west of ours AND the one just beyond it. The woman across the street lost her power, and started having all-night parties with the squatters, blaring loud music from cars parked in the street. Their yards became cluttered with shopping carts, literal piles of garbage, floor mats from fast food restaurants, and tires. So we started looking for a better place to live. About that time the stimulus checks came out, helping greatly with a down payment and fees. I was determined not to settle until we found a place I’d be willing to spend the rest of my life in. It took six months until we found this house. Don and I took turns refreshing realtor.com on and off all day. He found this house, and I called our agent. We had an offer in fifteen minutes after it was listed. Diligence, luck, and happenstance.

Obviously that leaves out mountains of details. But I don’t think any deity or otherworldly force helped at any point. Just in case, I’ll say, “Praise Bast”. I’ve had the same two statues for over twenty years. She gets her incense and offerings, and I certainly do my best for her metaphorical children.

But if gods matter, then she should try whatever branch of Islam the Saudi royalty uses.

Last updated October 28, 2022