Apart from the icy weather for being the reason, I’ve been doing one of my favourite things, hugging hot water bottles because of the monstrous menopause. This morning at 1:10am I’m out of bed for a cuppa and about the billionth wee-ing session and gets back to bed about 1:30 with the intention of then doing myself and hubby a new hot water bottle each as the first ones had gone cold.
I go into the bedroom to find hubby singing! ‘’I STEAL your hot water bottle, hold it tiiiiiight, stop you having it, you’ll be frozen allll niiiight! You’re a grotty old bag! I can plainly see! You don’t deserve it! It belongs to MEEEEEE!’‘
I reminded him, in fits of laughter we have one bottle each and he can’t nick mine when it’s needed by ME so I playfully clop him round the cake’ole and snatch mine back!
He then sings ‘’But, grotty old bag, this is not riiiiight! You’re only a woman with menopausal bloating making you viciiiious and tiiight! I am the MAAAN, heroic and bold! I’m not having the wifey making me COLLLLLD!
So make me a new one, you hideous old trolllllop! Pour hot water IIIIN, making a splash and a dollop! The pain of the menopause, you are fakkking, it’s not REEEALLL! Then tonight you can serve me a cuppa and MEAAAALLL!’‘ The psycho in me is beginning to get more psycho-er now…! HA HA HA!