I never quite got this phrase - “take up space” until yesterday.
I made the connection that my voice is minimized so much at home that I get paranoid in other interactions, worried someone views me as weak, overwhelming, too much, too needy, etc.
I had a minor crisis with my thoughts and needed to reach out to my narc abuse coach but she was grieving the loss of a special family member so I reached out to someone she’s is friends with who also does what she does. Hours went by. One voice message to her turned into five and my spiraled with so many negative thoughts about what she must be thinking about me that I unsent all of them, apologized, and told her I’m sorry for bothering her.
I have to stop doing shit like this.