As I composed my letter to Forrest that night, I asked myself over and over again whether or not I should mention that I snooped around and discovered the contents of his laptop. Finally, I decided I would play dumb and hope his mother would get it the hell out of the place soon so I couldn’t be implicated in anything, God forbid. I even wiped my fingerprints off the laptop as best as I could.
If I mentioned it in my letter to him, the guards would probably read it and that could get him into further trouble.
But then he had supposedly killed his own wife and maybe other things as well, hadn’t he? Should I really bother protecting him in that case?
After mulling it over in my mind for over an hour, I finally decided he was in enough trouble and because he had done so much for me, I would keep quiet for now as far as the many images of child pornography I had discovered in the file on his desktop went.
But was that really his thing? He never gave me any indication to think it was. But then why else would they be there? Was looking at them enough to appease a dark side of him I never knew existed? Or had I been cohabiting with an actual child pervert all this time?
My guess was that there was probably something more to the story of that folder. Forrest was clearly straight. I believed without a doubt that one was either straight, bisexual, gay or a child molester. Forrest really did seem to like women for sure.
So then why were they there? I really hoped I would never find out.
Then his mother phoned to say she would be coming by with her current husband in a truck to remove the rest of Forrest’s belongings, making my decision to keep silent easier. As long as no search warrants were executed in the middle of the night, no one would find me in possession of the damn laptop, and they didn’t need to know that I was aware of the disgusting images I’d found. So, I would keep that out of my letter since I didn’t want to risk implicating myself by admitting I knew about them and having the guard read me admit that and then me swearing to keep quiet about it. Wouldn’t that make me an accessory?
I turned my head in the direction of the bedroom, wishing I could will the device to disappear. I felt very uncomfortable just knowing it was in a place I was alone in at the moment. I wouldn’t even want it around even if Forrest was still there. To be that close to something so vile, filthy and highly illegal really made my skin crawl.
I realized that his mother must really think Forrest was guilty of something big and definitely not returning home anytime soon to be cleaning the apartment out completely.
Not having a handy way to print anything at the moment, I decided to write the letter by hand.
I don’t know what happened to cause you to be arrested except for what I heard. Whatever the true case may be, I hope you will be out of there soon, especially if you never harmed anyone. I would like to know the truth of what happened, but I understand that I can’t make you divulge anything you don’t want to and that we don’t have much privacy in our communications. But if you ever do decide to tell me what’s going on, promise me you won’t bother unless what you tell me is the absolute truth. I don’t want to write down what I heard of your case so far and I have a feeling you have a good idea of just what that is anyway.
I wanted to come see you but your mother asked me not to, insisting it would be better this way. She is aware that I have decided to write to you with or without her approval. If you absolutely do insist on a visit, I will come as long as it’s soon. Your wishes are more important to me than hers.
She and her husband are moving the rest of your belongings out of your place and I’m going to be here for the remainder of the month. At that time, I will be heading over to Germany where I have another cyber friend.
I want to thank you immensely for saving my ass as you did. You and I had some definite fun times together. As I said, I don’t know what really happened and you don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to tell. I’m not writing to judge you. I’m only grateful for the new start you’ve given me and the help you provided as well. I would be pretty lost or dead if it weren’t for you.
Please keep in touch and me informed about how your case is progressing and what the sentence, if any, will be. I’ll be sure to write again as soon as I have a new address. If you’re able to contact me online, that would be even better, of course. I know Norway prisons are a lot different than the US. I hope you’ll reply to this letter either way and give me some sense of what’s really going on. Most of all, I hope you get out of there soon!
Lots of Love,