Yin and Yang in Staying Connected

  • Feb. 18, 2021, 1:19 p.m.
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  • Public

It’s a busy day on Prosebox! I feel like I sometimes go days without any new bookmarks, and this morning I read two bookmarks and then, after finishing the second one, two more bookmarks showed up. I very much look forward to reading them, but sadly it’s going to have to wait. I’m already very behind schedule, and I really wanted to post an entry of my own!

First of all, it’s hard to believe that my hours were approved. I mean, I knew I completed the hours, and I knew I completed the paperwork, and I knew I did everything I was supposed to, but three months is a long time to wait for the “yes, you did this correctly.” Even more than that, four years is a long time to be working toward something with essentially zero outside management. What I mean by that is, yes, I worked over seven years toward my Bachelor’s degree. BUT, with my bachelor’s degree, every semester I got verification that I was getting credit for my work. Over these past four years, there was nothing like that. I just had to have faith that I was doing everything right.

One of the things that came up in conversation on my date with my husband was video games. I forgot how the topic came up, but I was sharing with my husband that on an intellectual level I think I can get the appeal, but emotionally I don’t think I’ll ever get it. I told him that I believe the appeal to him is that it’s a world that he gets to be in control of and the satisfaction of mastering, and maybe it’s especially attractive to the type of person who does not feel like they are in control of their real world. He went on to explain that he enjoys the problem-solving, the collaboration with others, and, yes, the mastery aspect of the games. The more he explained it, the more I was like… that’s exactly how I feel about my real life.

I thought about how that’s what Prosebox is to me. This is where I come to problem-solve and collaborate with others, and I enjoy the feeling of mastering various aspects of my life. Again, I don’t understand why anybody would think it’s more fun to do this in a fictional world than it is to do in the real world other than the belief that they are simply unable to do it in the real world.

Another thing we talked about was how we each imagine our children are going to be with one another once Morgan is born. Our first daughter, Leona, is a Capricorn, and according to all those people out there who like to follow the zodiac signs, Leona is a classic Capricorn. When I look at Leona, I see a very confident, assertive, and sometimes downright demanding little girl. From an early age, people pointed out how observant she was, and ever since she learned to communicate, she loves to direct other people in activities. We all joke that she’s going to be a manager someday.

Morgan is going to be a Cancer. From what I’ve heard, Cancer’s are mellow, sensitive, emotional, and affectionate. I can already tell she’s different in the womb than Leona was. Leona was an active little fetus. She was constantly kicking and moving around. Every time I got an ultrasound, she’d be in there dancing for us. Morgan is the complete opposite. If I feel her kick I will immediately stop what I’m doing and pay attention, and then… nothing. The last couple of times I saw her on ultrasound, she was just laying there. I’m like, are you sure she’s alive?

I’m picturing Morgan as the yin to Leona’s yang. My husband is so worried that having two girls means they’re going to get jealous of one another. It’s a possibility, sure, but that’s not how I see it going. Based on their personalities, I see Leona being a natural big sister. She’s going to enjoy being in the leadership role, showing Morgan the ropes. And I think Morgan will love it, too. Morgan will likely be more timid and shy, so having a confident big sister to encourage and guide her will be perfect.

I could be way off, haha… but it’s fun to imagine anyway.

Until next time <3

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