Qualities in a good rodeo clown include resilience, dependability and self-reliance. The life of a bull-dodger needs springiness combined with toughness. It requires a modicum or large measure of bouncebackability, which is the ability I am relying on recently. When I think about jumping into barrels, I think “dog toy, dog toy, dog toy…”
When I look at a lot of the rodeo clowns working in the biggest crews, I can clearly see that they lean on the brand, not on themselves. They wear the suspenders and the oversized pants of the Conklin Brothers or the Santa Fe Cowboys and admittedly they appear to be cohesive with strong teams behind the strong team identity.
But I know they’re not. At least I don’t think they are.
But I’m not a team player. I’m difficult to work with. Mostly because I don’t like the petty dynamics and the group think that team-membering requires. I have no patience. I also have little compassion, but that’s another story.
Someone less charming and of average intelligence but of strong character usually proves to be more reliable and productive over the long run. That’s my cut out.
It’s been tough lately. Winters are always tough on me. I don’t like them at all and I especially don’t like February. As a pessimist, it’s hard to stay positive but that’s where the hardiness and hardness comes in. Just two more weeks until we get to magical March, the turn around month full of hope and whim. 15 days left in my countdown.