- What’s the last thing you ate?
A drumstick off a Costco rotisserie chicken.
- What’s your favourite cheese?
Bon sondage, j’adore le fromage. But if I really had to choose a favorite, butterkase.
- What’s your favourite fish?
See, for someone who grew up in the Midwest, I really like fish. Of the ones I usually have access to, salmon is my favorite, closely followed by rainbow trout.
- What’s your favourite fruit?
Mango. I also discovered golden kiwis, which are like normal kiwis, but sweeter. I like green kiwis well enough, but they can vary wildly between “pleasantly tart” and “mouth and sphincter-puckeringly sour.”
- When, if ever, did you start liking olives?
Um… Well, I liked canned black olives from the time I was a toddler. For real, I don’t remember the first time I had one. I’ve just always liked olives. My favorite are castelvetranos, which are delightfully buttery in taste and texture. They’re really mild, too; if you think you don’t like olives, give these a try.
- When, if ever, did you start liking beer?
I never really did. I like a stout every now and then (I especially love coffee stouts), but I have yet to meet another type of beer I like.
- When, if ever, did you start liking shellfish?
Christmas 1995. My grandfather got me to try a cocktail shrimp. And for a long time, shellfish liked me back. Ever since I was in my twenties, though, my body can’t figure out what to do when I eat shellfish. Sometimes I can digest them; sometimes I can’t. Sometimes they make my throat swell shut. But I don’t have any one reaction often enough to know for sure if I’m allergic or not. It’s really weird.
- What was the best thing your mum/dad/guardian used to make?
My mother is a fantastic cook, and basically everything she makes is amazing. My favorite is her chicken fried steak with mushroom gravy.
- What’s the native specialty of your hometown?
Indianapolis is apparently known for something called “trash spaghetti”. I have lived here literally half my life, and not only have I never had trash spaghetti, but no one I know who’s lived here longer than I have has had it, either. My stepdad, who’s lived in Indy his entire life, had never even heard of it before I asked him about it. I can’t even find a recipe for it on Google.
Youngstown, Ohio, where I lived for the first sixteen years of my life, has Brier Hill pizza, and also Wedgewood pizza, which my mom and I used to get when we’d go in to visit family. And also Handel’s ice cream, which has since moved out to the Indy area (Fishers and Carmel), but there’s nothing like getting it from the original store. Sucks that the last time I was in Youngstown, that location was closed following an armed robbery. Fuckin’ Youngstown. I am not sorry I left.
- What’s your comfort food?
…Ramen. Yeah, I know, but we always had it in the house when I was a kid, and it’s quick, hot, and tasty.
- What’s your favourite type of chocolate?
All kinds, except that impostor “white chocolate.” Fuck outta here with that shit.
- How do you like your steak?
Depends on what type of steak it is. Flat iron, which is far and away my favorite inexpensive cut, is best when cooked medium-rare. Prime rib, New York strip, porterhouse, and T-bone should never be cooked past rare. Flank and skirt steak is best when marinated and grilled medium. Basically, as long as it isn’t well-done. Fuck outta here with that shit.
- How do you like your burger?
Cooked medium and topped with lettuce, tomato, mayo, dill pickles, cheese, bacon, and a fried egg.
- How do you like your eggs?
Over-easy; or, as we tri-state peeps call it, “dippy”. It’s dippy because you dip buttered toast into the yolk.
- How do you like your potatoes?
Baked and topped with vegetarian chili, cheese, and sour cream. (I don’t like ground beef chili. In general, I have problems digesting ground beef, however lean it is.)
- How do you take your coffee?
Iced, with half-and-half. Although, it’s now Pumpkin Spice season, so you know I’m gonna get a few PSL’s. Also, the Pumpkin Cream cold brew at Starbucks is a winner.
- How do you take your tea?
Iced black tea, unsweet. Either plain or Trader Joe’s mango black tea. Which I’m gonna have to stock up on, to make sure I don’t run out in the middle of winter.
- What’s your favourite mug?
My Snape mug, which I bought from a very limited edition line called “Always In Our Hearts” after Alan Rickman died. I can’t remember the name of the company, but I’m also about 60% through a can of Newton’s Folly. (It’s 5% ABV, and also, Seroquel makes me way more sensitive to alcohol.)
(This is when I went to bed on Saturday. Everything else is from today.)
- What’s your biscuit or cookie of choice?
- What’s your ideal breakfast?
A full English, and enough time to actually eat it. You know what? With WFH, I see no reason I can’t make myself a full English. Maybe I’ll do that this week.
- What’s your ideal sandwich?
Black forest ham on Aldi’s sliced brioche, with Kewpie mayo, romaine lettuce, tomato, and Swiss cheese.
- What’s your ideal pizza:
Mushrooms, spinach, chicken, and bacon, topped with mozzarella blend.
- What’s your ideal pie (sweet or savoury)?
I will never turn my nose up at apple pie.
- What’s your ideal salad?
Any type that isn’t lettuce-based.
- What food do you always like to have in the fridge?
Eggs, cheese, half and half, coffee, different types of fresh veggies, and black forest ham.
- What food do you always like to have in the freezer?
Frozen veggies (usually broccoli), some type of heat-n-eat meal (currently, Trader Joe’s kung pao chicken and a tray of spinach lasagna), certain leftovers (atm, Japanese crockpot curry and some black bean and veggie chili), homemade stock, and ice.
- What food do you always like to have in the cupboard?
At least three types of pasta, canned beans, canned tomatoes, and cream of mushroom soup, which can save just about any burnt/overcooked dish.
- What spices can you not live without?
Salt (ya’ll, if your food doesn’t taste good, salt it. That’s a restaurant chef’s secret), black pepper, garlic, currently three types of curry powder, cumin, chili powder, and, most recently, MSG. You read that right. I have a bag of MSG in my kitchen, and I use it. Everything I’ve cooked since I started using it tastes amazing. There’s actually no scientific proof that MSG causes any illness, and many foods you’re already eating contain high levels of it (mushrooms, for example, and most types of red meat); its demonization is mainly down to racism and malicious advertising.
- What sauces can you not live without?
- Where do you buy most of your food?
It’s about evenly split between Aldi (bread, pasta, flour, eggs, dairy products, most dry and canned goods), Fresh Thyme (meat and some produce), and Meijer (produce). And Kroger for frozen veggies, since they’re always 10 for $10 on the house brand.
- How often do you go food shopping?
Sadly, as much as I would like to stay home, about once a week, for fresh produce. COVID can take me if it must, but I’ll be damned if I go out from scurvy.
- What’s the most expensive piece of kitchen equipment you own?
That I bought myself? Probably my Dutch oven. And it’s not a super-expensive one, either (knock-off Le Creuset from Aldi), but it cost about $32, which is, I think, the most I’ve ever spent on kitchen equipment out of pocket. If I ever get a chance at a real Le Crueset, that’s gonna cost about $300.
- What’s the last piece of equipment you bought for your kitchen?
A digital scale.
- What piece of kitchen equipment could you not live without?
Well, clearly, the fridge. It’s what keeps my food from spoiling within a few days.
- How many times a week/month do you cook from raw ingredients?
Nearly every day.
- What’s the last thing you cooked from raw ingredients?
The person who filled this out before me (on Tumblr) kept confusing “raw ingredients” with “meat,” and so kept answering “I don’t cook meat.” However, raw ingredients are anything that you cook which start raw, which includes vegetables, eggs, herbs, and meat. Anyway, digression done.
I made a stock pot full of chilled borscht, and since I buy whole beets with the tops, I cut the greens down, sauteed them with olive oil, garlic, salt, pepper, and balsamic vinegar. Beet greens are good and good for you, kids!
- What meats have you eaten besides cow, pig and poultry?
Bison, duck, goose, and, apparently, venison. I’ve been told I’ve had it, but I honestly don’t remember what it tasted like.
- What’s the last time you ate something that had fallen on the floor?
I don’t. I don’t care how clean the floor looks, I’m not eating anything that fell on it. Periodt.
- What’s the last time you ate something you’d picked in the wild?
If I’m out walking and I see mulberry trees, and they’re in season, I’ll pluck a few off and eat them. It terrifies people when they see me doing it, but I know what mulberries look like. I would not do that with mushrooms, or any other type of berry, unless I was with a guide who knew and had a book to show me.
- Arrange the following in order of preference: Italian, Mexican, Chinese, Indian, Thai, Sushi
Italian, Indian, Chinese, Mexican, Sushi, Thai. I mean, in reality, they’re about equal.
- Arrange the following in order of preference: Vodka, Whiskey, Brandy, Rum
Vodka, rum, whiskey, brandy (which is last, only because it’s the only one I haven’t tried).
- Arrange the following in order of preference: Garlic, Basil, Lime, Mint, Ginger, Aniseed
Garlic, basil, ginger, mint, lime, aniseed (I loathe anything anise-flavored).
- Arrange the following in order of preference: Pineapple, Orange, Apple, Strawberry, Cherry, Watermelon, Banana.
Watermelon, cherry, pineapple, banana, orange, strawberry, apple.
- Bread and spread:
Butter and Marmite.
- What’s your fast food restaurant of choice, and what do you usually order?
Taco Bell, and usually a Crunchwrap.
- Pick a city. What are the best dining experiences you’ve had in that city?
New York - Lombardi’s. You guys, it is entirely worth the hype. All pizzas I’ve had since have been a letdown.
- What’s your choice of tipple at the end of a long day?
Once in a while, I’ll pour myself a glass of red wine. If it’s been an exceptionally trying day, I’ll upgrade to a vodka-cranapple or vodka-tonic.
- What’s the next thing you’ll eat?
Probably a Crunchwrap, on my way to the office.
- Are you hungry now?
Starting to be. I didn’t have breakfast this morning.
- Do you eat your breakfast everyday?
I’ve actually gotten better about this since lockdown/WFH, since I’m not rushing to get into the office by 8:30.
- At what time do you have breakfast?
If I have it, usually around 9:30 or 10 a.m.
- At what time do you have lunch?
Around 1 or so. It depends on if I’m going in to print that day (Monday and Thursday afternoons) or not, and if I’m hungry.
- What do you have for lunch?
Whatever I feel like having/can afford.
- At what time do you have dinner?
Between 6 and 7:30. I try not to eat later than that, or else I’ll have trouble sleeping. Not from heartburn or anything, but for whatever reason, for me, late dinner = bad sleep.
- What do you have for dinner?
Whatever I cook, or, once in a while, order in.
- Do you light candles during dinner?
No, but only because the only candles I have are scented. That messes with the taste of my food.
- How many chairs are there in your dining room and who sits in the main chair?
None, I have a tray table that I put in front of my couch.
- Do you eat and drink using your right hand or the left one?
- Mention the veggies that you like most:
Broccoli, asparagus, sweet potatoes, Brussels sprouts, green beans, edamame, beets… Honestly, I think the only veggies I genuinely dislike are green bell peppers, carrots, okra (unless it’s pickled), and peas.
- What fruit and vegetable do you like the least?
Veggies: See previous. Fruit: Raisins. Raisins are evil. I’m also not a fan of dragonfruit, which tastes like literally nothing.
- You like your fruit salad to have more:
Mmm, fruit salad…
- You prefer your vegetable salad to contain more:
Things that aren’t lettuce. Lettuce is fine on sandwiches, but for the love of all things good and wholesome, keep it out of my veggie salads! Replace it with roasted veggies and some type of grain.
- What’s your favourite sandwich spread?
I have discovered Kewpie mayo, and you’d better believe I’m never going back to Hellmann’s or Duke’s or any other American brand.
- What’s your favourite chocolate bar?
Green and Black’s dark chocolate bars, and their milk chocolate with almonds. Generally speaking, I don’t care for milk chocolate, but Green and Black’s does it really well.
- What’s your favourite dessert?
Brownies, warm, with vanilla ice cream and chocolate syrup.
- What’s your favourite drink?
Unsweet iced tea.
- What’s your favourite snack?
Tortilla chips and salsa.
- What’s your favourite bubble gum flavour?
I don’t chew bubble gum anymore; it’s too sweet and my teeth hurt for days after.
- What’s your favourite ice cream flavour?
Dark chocolate, like in Ben and Jerry’s New York Super Fudge Chunk.
- What’s your favourite potato chip flavour?
Sour cream and onion.
- What’s your favourite soup?
At the moment, chilled vegetarian borscht. In general, chicken noodle.
- What’s your favourite pizza?
Margarita, which is just tomato sauce, fresh mozzarella, and basil leaves. The simplicity is its greatest feature.
- What’s your favourite type of dish?
Anything that has a little bit of everything. I think one reason I was so taken with bento, years ago, is that it’s basically a sampler lunch.
- What food do you hate?
Anything anise/black licorice-flavored, liver, fried okra, and green bell peppers.
- What’s your favourite restaurant?
In Indianapolis: China Bistro and Salsa Verde.
- Do you eat homemade food, or food delivered from outside?
Homemade mostly, but I’m also kind of embarrassed at how much take-out I’ve ordered in the last six months.
- Who cooks at home?
Me, Myself, and I.
- What kind of diet (e.g. low-fat, high-fiber, high-carbohydrate, balanced diet etc.) do you have?
The “I eat whatever I want” diet.
- How do you keep yourself fit?
Just Dance for Nintendo Wii. Also, portion control, which is less successful.
Last updated September 09, 2020