What are some of your favorite cities you’ve been to?
New York, Boston, and Dublin.
Would you allow your children to date prior to 16? (assuming you want any)
I would, but I’d also say it has to be chaperoned.
Did you ever go through a phase where you thought guys in bands were ‘hot?’
…You know, I never went through a phase where I thought guys in bands were hot, but at the age I probably should have (14-18ish, you think?), I thought there were a lot of hot girls in bands. 14-18, though, Alan Rickman, Daniel Radcliffe, and David Tennant were the only guys I really cared about. Hashtag “yup, she definitely bi.”
What’s something about adult life you were never warned of or prepared for?
//gestures broadly at everything// A pandemic, I think I could have dealt with. Watching my country careen right into oligarchy and dictatorship, I could have dealt with. A long-overdue reckoning about how deeply entrenched racism is in our society, I could have dealt with. Even having a toxic narcissist dealing with dementia as president, I think I could have dealt with. But all of it at the same time? The next edition of the DSM is going to have “2020-related PTSD” as a condition, I’m sure of it.
Did your parents teach you proper table manners when you were growing up?
Yes. Sometimes I even still practice them. (I kid, I have impeccable table manners.)
What was the last thing you baked?
The hazelnut scones from Vegan With A Vengeance. They were an epic fail, and I’m fairly unhappy about it, since it’s just about the most expensive recipe in the book. It calls for a cup of hazelnut meal (which was $14 for a 1lb bag on Amazon, which was the only place I could find it), a half-cup of vegan hazelnut creamer (the brand I used, NutPods, is the only brand of vegan hazelnut creamer I’ve been able to find out here, and since it’s made from hazelnut milk, a pint was about $5), chopped hazelnuts ($5 for a half-pound bag at Aldi), and hazelnut-flavored coffee ($8 for a 1lb bag; by the way, whatever happened to the little, $2 or $3 sampler bags of coffee you used to be able to get? Like, there was only enough in there for one pot, but it was enough to tell if you wanted to get the entire pound and cheap enough that you didn’t feel bad if you didn’t like it? I wanted one of those for this recipe, just for cost control; I actually do like hazelnut coffee, so I’m not overly upset about buying a whole pound of it). Bakers of Prosebox, tell me where I went wrong: In a recipe that calls for 2 cups of flour, 1 cup of hazelnut meal, and a combined 1.5 cups of liquid, how did I get a significantly wet, loose batter? The book said it should have been a dry and crumbly dough that would “just stick together.”
Do you live more than 5 hours away from the nearest international border?
Yes. (Okay, I have done this one before; I mentioned that Indianapolis is about 8 hours away from the Canadian border.)
Does your town have a farmer’s market?
Yes, but I’m not sure how they’re going to go with COVID.
What’s the westernmost point you’ve been to?
Either Tulsa, Oklahoma, or Iowa Falls. I’m not sure.
What was the last restaurant you made a reservation at?
I have literally never made a reservation at a restaurant.
When did you last feel lonely?
Last night, though that might have been less “lonely” and more “horny”.
Can you easily tell when others are masking their true emotions?
I assume most people are masking their true emotions, all the time.
How often do you wash your car?
Once or twice a year. I might take it through the car wash this week, actually.
When did you last lend money to a friend?
My friends all make more than I do, so they never ask.
Which app on your phone do you tend to get the most notifications from?
The Sims FreePlay.
Do you own a Dutch oven? If so, what was the last thing you cooked in it?
Yes, and short rib ragu. It was mind-meltingly delicious.
Do you find it easy to put yourself in somebody else’s shoes?
Most of the time.
What is currently on your kitchen table?
Nothing, I don’t have a kitchen table. There’s a shit ton of stuff on my breakfast bar, including my toaster, coffee maker, rice maker, and various jellies, but I don’t eat there.
What is your favorite time period in history to learn about?
Basically all of it, but I’ve had a particular fascination with Soviet history for a long time.
How old were you when you met your current best friend?
Have you ever kissed a smoker?
Yes. 0/10, do not recommend.
What is the minimum age to obtain a driver’s license in your state/country?
^ Do you think this is an appropriate age, or should it be higher/lower?
I really do think it should be higher, like 18 or 20. A couple more years of maturity would do a lot to prevent the stupidity I see on a daily basis (texting while driving, riding someone’s bumper, over-relying on brakes, that kind of thing And yes, I know adult drivers do all of these things, too; of all the areas I think are over-policed, traffic laws are not one of them).
If you won the lottery, do you think any of your family members would ask you to give them some of your money?
My paternal family would. My brother probably would, too, but I wouldn’t give it to him.
What is the craziest thing you’ve seen happen at your workplace?
Day job: The crazy never ends.
Part-time: Customers throwing tantrums over stupid shit, like how many cheese sauces they ordered or getting upset because they didn’t know our pizzas come thin-crust and party-cut as default.
Do you own any home automation gadgets like wifi thermostats or wifi bulbs?
How old were you when you started to seriously think about what career path you wanted to pursue?
Have you ever disliked a book so much that you didn’t finish it?
Lolita. Yes, I knew what it was about going in. Yes, it was still too icky for me to finish.
Would you rather read a book, or listen to the audiobook?
It depends on how much of an attention span my prefrontal cortex grants me on a daily basis.
Do you think tomorrow will be a better day than today?
I expect absolutely nothing from the future, right now.
Last updated June 15, 2020