Boo Hoo in 2020 A Year to Focus on ME

  • Feb. 16, 2020, 10:22 a.m.
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Arizona is boohooing because I don’t want to go get Pogo research with him. He never wants to do anything I want to do, why do I always have to do all the things he wants to do?! He knows I’m not into Pogo like I used to be. I’ve been up since 8 so I could have B take care of things before she went to work at 9. Then she texts me from her bedroom while I was busy doing things saying she doesn’t work until 930. 🙄 I told her to find out last night. Anyway, if he really wanted me to go with him maybe he should have gone with me to take B to work because we could have picked up from there, but he didn’t.

We were just out yesterday for hours playing Pogo due to some event. I don’t always go anymore because he’s so obsessed with this stuff it’s all he can see.

He’s so self absorbed.

I feel he’s even deeper into himself because I think he’s kind of over us. The glamor of dating and having a life in girlfriend and all that crap. I can’t say I blame him, living with him isn’t my cup of tea either.

I’ve said since we moved here that I wish he would take an interest in things I like a TRUE genuine interest. And to find things we both like. He hasn’t. And for things we both like, he looks at things HE likes and finds ways to make me like them vs trying something new that we both could like.

He doesn’t even try to hang out with me if I’m doing/watching something on my own. He doesn’t try to get into anything just because. He will leave the room and do his own thing in the bedroom. So this has me programmed to turn off whatever I was watching and hand over the remote to him. I stay in the room with him when he watches 10 year old Food Network reruns he’s seen half a dozen times. It annoys me, I think it’s stupid and it’s a waste of time and his life but whatever. I do my thing on the laptop or my phone or read a book or start cooking or cleaning or work on sewing or whatever mini project I might have going if that’s how I chose to use my time. Sometimes I watch, I’ll even comment on things, I’ll look at crap he’s rewound for me to see (I HATE it when he rewinds it makes my blood boil, he rewinds EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME, even if I told him I’ve seen it).

If I have to talk about something he’s done lately that’s made me happy…it’s that last night he went to bed at 10pm. He doesn’t stay up late if he doesn’t drink. But he was in a funk all afternoon into the evening so he was just awkward to be around. B said it was because I had wanted to do things while we were out and about and when he asked what I said I just wanted to go home. I reminded her that he didn’t want to do anything I wanted to do or that she wanted to do. He was so absorbed in Pogo world until the event was over and only then could he even try to consider us and by that point I knew he was doing it to save face.

What is it I had wanted to do? Just check out shops in the town we were in. And then find a Goodwill because I wanted to look for some books. We aren’t often in this area anymore unless we are Pogoing and I don’t randomly drive in this area when others are closer, I always think 2 birds, 1 stone. It was stuff that I knew he had no interest in. Everyone knows what it’s like dragging along an unwilling person to do things they have zero interest in. The impatient body language and looks just wasn’t how I wanted to spend my time. So we did come straight home, I even took the highway and I NEVER drive on the highway.

Boy is still pouting in the bedroom. He can venture out by himself he will survive.

I have a few projects to do. I still have to work on my St Patrick’s Day wreath. I was hoping I could find 1 more set of ribbon. I think I’ll look at Hobby Lobby after I take B to theatre tomorrow morning. May as well stay in the area. I might take her to another Goodwill tomorrow, I’m searching for a decent one that’s not too far away. I picked up some really nice but cheap jeans at goodwill yesterday so i can patch up some of B’s jeans. I hope I can fix them and the fix stays put long enough for it all to pay off.

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