chocolatechip ⋅ 59

I have a lot of mental health issues, that periodically interfere with having serenity in my life. I do the best that I can.

Our thoughts, words and actions are multi-faceted. They affect every aspect of our lives.

chocolatechip

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Tenaciously, they cling Whispering in the wind. What is their love, Of December’s will? How do they bear, It’s chastising chill? Hang on, Live on, Lovingly, Longingly. ‘Til the sugar-coated dust...


The sun cast its shadow On black twig branches. Only there was a glow, A warmth. Ah, the beauty. The mystery. He must be somewhere. I looked over my shoulder. A spectacular sunset, Through the “...


The sky appeared foreboding, A vastness of grey. For what would be the outcome, Of this bleak October day? I am envisioning prosperity, As the months doth unfold. It is that time of the season, F...


I never understood the sadness, That plagued my daddy’s face. What was the very reason? Could I have been the case? He loved me oh so very much. I could see it in his eyes. His gentle, kind demea...


The seasons change. We do, as well. Portions of our lives unveil. Ashes to ashes, Dust to dust. Into new beginnings, We are seemingly thrust. The embers soon die, Soon cometh a chill. Stay warm, ...


It trickles down through the soul, Adversity among people. Callousness. Indifference. Lack of empathy. Slinging arrows, Oh how they sting. And their aim? The most undeserving, Peace loving, Meek,...


For this past holiday weekend I constructively spent my time. I have a fairly large bedroom closet. I went through everything. The things that I no longer want nor use were discarded. ...


I am taking this weekend to organize my bedroom. Surprisingly, I do not have as many things to sort through as I thought I did. It will be a fairly easy project. Tomorrow, I am going to go throug...


Today, my daughter is taking me shopping. It will be good to get out.


I guess that, given my track record the new normal for myself is to make friends, then lose friends. I let things build, then when I can no longer take the personality conflicts, I give them a pi...


This morning, I have a doctor’s appt. I got up at 4. I did not think that I would be feeling mentally well this morning, but things are actually coming along nicely. I had coffee, went out for a ...


Life has many twists and turns, especially when a person gives about 99%, and receives about 1%.


There was a verbal confrontation. In their eyes, they did no wrong, then they proceeded to write me off.


June 29, 2020

Mood Shift. in And So It Goes....

I’m not doing very well. I feel sad, nervous and depressed. I have been isolating today, in my apartment, for the most part. My phone has been ringing off the wall. I can’t deal with it right now...


June 29, 2020

Life... in And So It Goes....

My life seems to go up and down like a roller coaster. Perhaps the reason is b/c I was diagnosed w/ Bipolar 1 Disorder.


June 29, 2020

Cortisol... in And So It Goes....

I was so stressed and upset over last night’s argument, that when it was time to turn in for the night, I had a very difficult time falling asleep, and staying asleep. Right now, despite two stro...


June 29, 2020

Conflict... in And So It Goes....

Unfortunately, yesterday I had a confrontation w/ a friend, whom is also a member of the party committee. Twice, in the past I have had talks w/ her regarding her know-it-all attitude. She also c...


It is helpful to have friends, and it is helpful to socialize. However, I also like to have my “alone” time. I like to browse on my laptop. I have “favorite” sites. I check in w/ Bear periodicall...


I was a latecomer to bingo, tonight. I am paid up for the whole month, but did not think that I was going to go. Actually, I was going to let another person play my cards, and keep any prizes the...


Thus far, it’s been a very good day. For the cookout, the committee has pretty much finalized the plans. The sign up sheet is on the glass wall, directly where the tenants have a good view, as th...


The staff almost had to send Bear to the hospital. He had red drainage from his rectum, projectile emesis and severe dyspepsia. Bloodwork was ordered. If these symptoms present, again They said h...


Organization and plans are going swimmingly for the 4th of July Bash. My friend drew some beautiful signs for the event. She posted them, early so that the tenants would know about it early on. ...


They delivered the fireplace. It is beautiful. In the middle, I centered a small lamp. to the left is a set of three blue antique glass apothecary jars. To the left of the lamps sits a small fram...


This afternoon, I drug myself into the shower, then took my trash out to the dumpster. Inspite of feeling ill, I managed to toggle through my usual morning routine, and did some floor mopping wi...


I got up at 7am. After that I presented with diarrhea, slight chills and copious amounts of nasal drainage. I medicated w/ 30cc of Bismuth for the gastrointestinal symptom, the drainage eventuall...


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