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The Real Pretend Mulling

by Pretend Mulling

Entries 728

Page 1 of 30

October is the treasurer of the year, And all the months pay bounty to her store; The fields and orchards still their tribute bear, And fill her brimming coffers more and more. But she, with yout...


October 09, 2020

In a parallel universe...

Phantom of the Opera was a rock opera in the style of Tommy. Directed by Ken Russell and all. I have to admit, I want to see this version. But in that universe, instead of Steve Harley, can we...


Helen Reddy, singer of “I Am Woman,” died yesterday. I hate to think that this is portentous, but her death, coming on the heels of Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s, just gives me a bad feeling all around. ...


I hate falling down internet rabbit holes. Since I have a boring, fairly low-effort job, and since this week has been extremely slow at said job, I’ve taken to watching longplays of different vid...


A liberal communications guru explains why playing into Trump’s demagoguery on the election or mass protests only helps his cause — and hurts Joe Biden’s chances of winning By Andy Kroll WASHINGT...


September 18, 2020

Friday

I was going to write something almost witty and possibly funny here about trying to quell the Drama Llama with “not tonight, I have a headache,” but… I found out that Ruth Bader Ginsburg died. Ju...


September 16, 2020

Dorkily dorking along *UPDATED*

I’ve been watching longplays of my favorite Nintendo games for at least two weeks. Fun Fact: This game is the actual sequel to Super Mario Bros. But, as you might see from this video, Lost Leve...


Algebra, Women’s Bodies Edition. If X represents the amount of weight I’ve lost in the last eight weeks (8 lbs), and Y is the former size of my bra (36D), solve for Z, the current size of my bra....


Occasionally, I am reminded that this jewel exists, and life becomes just a bit brighter, not to mention sillier, just for a moment.


Me, yesterday: Oh man, I feel good. I had sex for the first time since February, I finally finished some projects I was behind on at work, and I even got my bricked Kindle shipped back to Amazon...


September 01, 2020

I'm a filthy whore.

I’m not saying that because I finally got laid. I’m not saying that because I am writing this entry naked. Although, I am. But mainly because I’m trying to cool off from 70 minutes of Just Danc...


August 27, 2020

Spooky Scary Skeletons

Send shivers down your spine.


Eh, I’m not gonna go through my entries and see. I’m lazy. I have a Zoom interview for another job tonight. Admin assistant at a private law firm, pays about $38,000 a year (what? what?! I mi...


August 16, 2020

Feminine Issues

I came across a video on YouTube a few months ago. It was Sir Patrick Stewart telling Graham Norton how he’d found out, at age 75, that he actually was not circumcised, as he’d always believed. ...


Don’t Worry, It Only Seems Kinky the First Time


My period is kicking my ass. How badly, you ask? I had take-out two nights in a row this week: Pad Thai on Monday and Domino’s yesterday. That never happens, ever. And it’s not like I don’t h...


This song has been playing almost nonstop in my head for the last week.


July 17, 2020

Random Life Updates

My herbs, which I was trying to grow from seed, are either majorly struggling (chives), got sunburned (cilantro and basil), or were eaten by critters (everything else, including the dill, which h...


July 05, 2020

This is cool...

A compilation of songs that were either cut from Hamilton or changed before opening night. I think “Congratulations” is my favorite, but I can see why it was cut. That was Eliza’s moment, not A...


Example: I am currently not wearing pants. Underwear, yes, but not pants. Speaking of, I ordered three pairs of my usual jeans (Lee midrise bootcut, black, size 12) from Walmart, after not being...


I took my car, a 2010 Subaru Forester, in for basic maintenance today, and I also asked if they could check my transmission fluid. It’s been shifting a little too roughly for my taste, and since...


June 21, 2020

That feel when...

You turn in all of your assignments that you put off until way too late, fifteen minutes before all of them are due. I’ve got more to say, but I need to get to bed.


I met the Gen-Z’er at the Olive Garden, because if there’s anything that can bridge the distance between a Millennial and a Gen-Zer, it’s the pillowy softness and buttery, garlicky delight that i...



June 09, 2020

Dear scammers:

//clears throat// STOP TEXTING ME WITH FAKE FUCKING “JOB OFFERS” AND CLAIMING YOU GOT MY INFO FROM INDEED. Know how I know? Because you’re texting me. I have specifically opted OUT of text mess...


Book Description

WYSIWYG.